"Playing" apart is the #1 no-no for us. I think a lot of couples feel that if it isn't done together then it isn't done. We talk about it but I don't think either of us will do that. We are just having too much fun!

Jim
its good to see an update, sounds like you guys are getting back on track

Ms. Voya

In response to Berm,
Not all truckers wives are like that. Mr. S and I have been married 11 years and I have never entertained the thought. What we do, we do together, period. We talk a lot about being lonely and missing each other, but that makes seeing each other even more special. Perhaps thats why we only play occasionally. But when we do, va va voom, the heat goes up for us and we love each other more if thats possible.

Jimbo, don't take the blame, man. We, as adults, are each responsable for OUR OWN actions. Give a man a gun, nothing wrong... what he does with it is HIS responability. Glad you took the path of forgiveness. Maybe someday the idea of swinging will sink in... if it never happens, at least you have each other. Role-playing and other games in the room can be just as fun. Don't get pushy! Take care.

Juni

Ok Ok... She quit her job. We renewed our wedding vows and have been happy for a year now. She wants no part of swinging, and we don't fantasize about it any more. It seems I wasn't paying enough attention to her. I take all the blame.

If the idea that was put in her head was a threesome, and she went and fucked someone else WITHOUT YOU, then it has nothing to do with your idea... there's a difference between swinging and cheating, and THAT was cheating. I don't think cheating like that is grounds for divorce, but don't let her make you think that YOU made her do it. It's a sneaky defense on her behalf though.
As far as her not wanting to swing with you, No Means No. Letting her know that you're open to discuss it if she changes her mind should be enough IMHO.

Cheater!!!!!! My first wife had been marreid for before we met. That marriage ended becasue she had multipel affairs. Her excuse? A friend of his had come on to her. SHe told him, and he didn't go beat up the friend. He just said I'm glad you turned him down. "Well, you weren't that upset when your friend hit on me, so I figured it was okay". She then had atleast half-a-dozen other guys in 2 years (he was Navy and out to sea a lot). Long story how we met.... short version, MFM with my friend and his ex... Now my ex too. So, I (also Navy) end up living with her. (She got pregnant about the time of our first date, and let me think it mine for 6 months). I married her. My ship was in the yards, so I was home all the time. First FMF here when a friend of hers named Kat came onto her. I said fine as long as I get to join in. And I did get to. Turns out Kat not so bi, it seems she wanted to me with me more than ex. We did it a second time and Kat barely notices wife was there, so it didn't happen again. So, jump ahead a year. We're married, baby. Ship is out of the yards and I'm out to sea a lot doing build ups and quals preparing for West Pacific deployment. One of her good friend splits with husband, and while I'm out to sea for a week or two at a time, they're going out more and more. Other things in her demeaner tell me she's about to cheat on me. So, I sit her down. Very clearly..... please, please, please don't do it. But, if you do: Not in my house. Not around my kids. Not in our bed. Not with the same guy more than once (that is a relationship, not sex). You have to tell me so I can maintain trust you are not lying. I get to do the same when I am goen for 6 months to pacific. Sure enough, VERY next time I'm out to sea, I come home.... She sits me down. I met a guy at the dance club. We fooled around, BUT... are you ready... since you got to be with Kat, I had the right to be with another guy. Where? in our bed with the kids in the next room. And he came backfor seconds a couple days later. And would I mind if she kept it as an ongoing thing, just while I'm out to sea? WHAT? It was pure rationalization on her part. There is a HUGE difference between Kat when she was there in the room and approving and me being out to see and having told her not to. Almost split us up. Jump ahead a couple more years. We're awesome friends with next-door neighbors. One night the fantasy of two women comesup in conversation. I've done that. They'd done MFM. Both had thought of couple.... Over the next few months things escalate to strp poker, soft swing, FULL swing. Turns out, my wife and the other guy were f'n around in the afternoons without permission of either spouse. When I found out... yep... Since you let me do him, it is your fault. No, she was a cheater. We were marreid another 10 years after that (14 in total), and sure enough, more affairs the whole time. And each was my fault for that first MFM, or FMF or the MFMF or..... I'm so much happier married to a woman I 100% trust!

Go with your gut....shes a cheater.

Just noticed the dates.

btw...they hit the nail on the head that she was probably cheating BEFORE you mentioned swinging...very perceptive! If you decide to end things with her....I definitely wouldnt cheat on her at all....and I'd get rid of this sls account or any traceable reference to it so she cant claim in court that you were cheating on her ...too or first Best of luck!