Looking for a honest opinion: Swingers Discussion 197827101

155
Looking for a honest opinion: Swingers Discussion 197827101

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TOPIC: Looking for a honest opinion

Created by: HotGinger47	The original post for this thread was deleted.

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User Details are only visible to members.	"This isnt swinging anymore " There you go in a nut shell Swinging is not, and should not be one sided , unless it is what you are into and agree upon it ahead of time. It is obvious she NOT being honest with you . Sit her down and have a talk before it escalates even more. Good Luck
Augusta NJ			Username hidden (16075 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I have first hand experience with EXACTLY what you are describing. You guys are not swinging. She and that guy have moved beyond that. She is having an affair and emotions are involved now. Once one partner starts making decisions on their own against the wishes of their spouse, the love train has left the station. I guarantee if you tell her you dont want her to "play" with him anymore, she will refuse to comply. She will get nasty with YOU. You have a big problem on your hands. Ive experienced it, and seen it happen to friends of ours too. This isnt swinging anymore
Mount Juliet TN			Username hidden (662 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	This is not a good situation ! Before Mrs John and I play both of us have to agree, If either one of us has doubts no one plays. We are in this for each other and of course for ourselves, but the main thing here is no one takes one for the team, both must be happy or it ends. There is no way we are jeopardizing our relationship for an outsider. you didn't mention if you two had ground rules before you started, did you ? It sure sounds like she is starting to like this person an awful lot, she is starting to get irritated buy you questioning her, thats never a good sign. what you two need to do is sit down and talk, without any conversation this is going to get worse.
Philadelphia PA			Username hidden (2062 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	HotGinger, I second what TotalBabe said. You are not the first to have problems like this and post about it in the Forums so the advice CAN be found elsewhere, but it all comes down to the advice you already got: stop everything, discuss your perceptions and feelings about what's going on with your wife, and get clarification from your wife about her intentions. It does sound like she has moved the relationship with this guy into the affair category and you have let it go on. Successful swinging requires both parties to be happy with the boundaries and activities you engage in, not just one. Some men enjoy being cuckolds, but it sounds like you do not. Let your wife know that, and tell her how you want to be included in all of the playtime, not just when some guy "allows" it. YOU and YOUR WIFE are the people who set the boundaries for yourselves, NOT the other guy.
Sheboygan Falls WI			Username hidden (6979 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	HotGinger47, welcome aboard! You say you met him as a couple. Please specify? Did you mean you both went to meet him or did you mean the guy is a part of a couple and plays separately with permission? All kinds of red flags here... But please remember, this is just my opinion. That is what you are asking for, an input from others. Their point of view. So, with that being said... First time with him, HE told you to watch TV. Do you always let your wife play with a guy alone on a first meet, while you wait? It would seem, at least the first time, you should be present, for safety's sake, if nothing else. Do you and your wife enjoy MFM or do single guys play with her only without any involvement from you? And wait, he told you to watch TV... How fucking rude!!! That would be the end of meeting for me. And no follow up either. Second time, he came to your house and you watched his kid ride your horses. DID HE COME TO YOUR HOUSE WITH HIS DAUGHTER????? That is just fucked up, in my opinion. Bringing children along??? WTF??? the next few times you let her go despite bad gut feeling, and she keeps texting and talking to him... Have you asked her to stop? Have you seen any of the messages? Did she let you read any of them? Does she talk with him with you present, so you can hear the conversation? Even though you do not like that guy, you let her go meet him to keep her happy. Are you happy that she is happy? It sure as hell does not sound like it. You try to get an explanation, she brushes it off and tells you to get over it. You have a problem. And a serious one! STOP!!! Time to sit down and have a grown up conversation with your wife. To me, she is acting like she is having an affair, only you know about it... Swinging or not, there has to be complete trust and mutual respect in a relationship. You do not trust her on that guy, she does not respect you on that matter. Time to cut this short, no ifs, buts or maybes. Yes, this will be tough. You seem to have let her have her way for a little too long. Time to put your foot down. It is your marriage that is at risk. From what I am reading and hearing, this does happen at times. Your marriage is the most important to you. Time to find out if she sees it the same way or she has her priorities rearranged now. I hope this is just a fling and she will come to realize she is acting hurtfully and very selfishly. Best of luck!
Panama City Beach FL			Username hidden (1934 post)

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TOPIC: Looking for a honest opinion