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Is the online experience a trap : Swingers Discussion 69250
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TOPIC: Is the online experience a trap
Created by: TripleThreat The original post for this thread was deleted.
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no disrespect but i felt TRAPPED ready that last post!!!!

and the profile was "blocked" as to couples so i couldn't see who they were

Philadelphia PA
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New to the life style with a long time interest I kind of finger I am smart enough to say with confidence I real don't know a whole lot . However I can say from are experiences as a couple . The wealth of information ability to start off with a scents of anonymity that could have only been obtained from this particular media a swingers site . I feel as a couple we very well may have continued to say . Perhaps the life style is right for us . Apposingly we are now able to say . What a wonderful time we are having . However it can be very annoying investing a great deal of effort with on return . For us we are less concerned with the performance issues that could occur . We real don't have any expectation . If it's good no doubt we will be back . If it's a few drinks nice time night out . Hay we learned something meet someone had a good time . What is very awning is when the plans are made . The pictures sent . A clear understanding is made as to the desire . Then to person or persons no longer have a interest . The cost of anonymity can often lead to a person speaking to a desire before building the level of confidence required to follow throught . Or to be sure and come to realize your partner is not ready . Ya it pissed me off and with that said I am compelled to say . We are sorry to anyone we may have been guilty of misleading when we first started . Once more to the fact we are fairly new . We could very well be die wrong . We like to meet on line a few e-mails . Not waste a lot of time . Have sex then coffee and see wear it's going . Be clear honest and let are add work for us . We don't even have to pay for are own beer at the bar . Just log in now and again and check are mail meet nice people . Could be a one night stand . Could even turn are privacy on stop running are add as we are going to be very tied up for a little bit . And you can never tell , We may very well be tied up and not just busy :)

Windsor Canada
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We trap people from here all the time and have sex with them. :)

Rochester NY
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im with pj, what's the problem? u met and got laid and didn't like. chalk it up to experience and move on. as for us we have met a ton of great sexxy people online that we would never have met just in bars.. so for us, anyway, trap away...

Philadelphia PA
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I guess I'm a bit baffled at what the problem is here?

After a period of time of fun sexy correspondence you finally met and describe her as a nice lady and mutually decide to take the next step. Were you feeling sparks from her after meeting her, or just caught up in the wild stories she'd been telling you online and acting upon them?. (Your little head leading your big head?) Sounds like bait and switch. lol In all reality, did you really spend time in person to get to the point of knowing, or pretty much just finish your dinner (or coffee or whatever) and hit the sheets?

I'm from the idea of meeting online people you can't tell until you actually meet in person whether there's chemistry or not. Perhaps the anticipation and expectations were what really was turning you on.. instead of the lady herself.

The online experience wasn't the trap... it was how you used the experience. ;-)

PJ

Tulsa OK
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Gents, please allow me to give a lady's perspective in response to the OP. First of all, I COMPLETELY relate to your experience and frustration. We became so frustrated over things that happen in the lifestyle we came a hair's length away from completely washing our hands of it and walking away. What we have adopted is this. We either receive an email, or send one. If there is interest we pretty much from JUMP tell the couple/person that we want to meet for dinner and/or drinks at a vanilla est. preferably. We meet, and then we know whether or not there is chemistry, attraction, etc. We have no issues with playing on the first meeting, so if there is a spark there for all we can either go from there or set up to meet to play. I have found that when people email and I say "okay, no problem. Email me a picture please" most people never email back. If they send me the email and we talk, cool, and Jay or I say Okay, lets go ahead and meet for drinks Friday evening most don't write back. This has helped us already weed out alot of fakers. Unfortunately, we have found that most of the "swingers" on sls (I only use sls because we are only on this site pretty much) are fakes. They either get off on the fantasy of the lifestyle, or think its funny to jerk you around. I have better things to do (like fuck real swingers lol) than talk, talk, talk, then POOF! I wish my credit report would POOF! like some of these people LOL. Shelly

San Marcos TX
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Oh Simbaxx, I wish I had that quantity vs quality problem lol

Grand Junction CO
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TheShrew - the problem is that there are plenty of people you fuck the first time and they ARE good. So, it becomes more difficult to allow others that were ho hum the first time around to get several other chances when they are competing with first time rounders that can and do make it wonderful up front. Their personality would have to go a long ways to get a second round after a bad or ho hum time - there are just too many fish in the sea...

Battle Ground WA
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I would never judge a womans performance on the first encounter. I would hope that I would not be judged on one performance. Sometimes nerves and jitters crop up the first time. A few months ago I me a lady after many emails. She was not even an average fuck the first time, just kind of layed there. Well let me tell you by about the third time she turned into a moaning screaming fuck that rate near the best I have had. I know that I have also had some poor first perfomances, nerves jitters and cumming to fast, knowledgeable experienced women always invite you back because they know that fucking just gets better with time.

Grand Junction CO
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TT I believe the in person accidently meeting at a bar etc. reaps higher levels of fun.....ONLY because you can easily evaluate someone quickly and not put in a lot of invested time....so your pay off comes easier since the investment isn't as much. For instance.... lady "A" you invest 2 hours at a by chance meeting somewhere and go to bed... you rate the event a 7 on a sale of 10. You meet the same lady "A" after MONTHS of emails and flirting and finally your schedules mesh and you rate her a 4 on a scale of 10. Why? Your yard stick for measurement changes with the more invested.... you expect a bigger pay off for all the work you put in to it.

Honestly, this is why we choose to meet new people (chance meetings) at a swing club.... because of this very problem. Over time we have seen that if there is a big build up....it's very difficult for a person to live up to it....thus the let down. My own 2 'c of course...:)

Battle Ground WA
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TOPIC: Is the online experience a trap