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The Art of Flirting : Swingers Discussion 21116810102
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TOPIC: The Art of Flirting
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Wow NicAtNight, Rdy2play was right!! "You don't have to walk up and introduce yourself if you are too shy, but be open to people approaching you."...excellent advice!

Flirting on-line is much easier as we can Google the perfect "turn-of-phrase" for the situation, but in person our wit just isn't that quick. Usually takes a few sips of "liquid courage" before the innuendos and entendres start to flow! :-) At our first few lifestyle events we could barely make eye contact as we thought "Oh Shit, we're staring!" until we realized you're SUPPOSED to stare at a lifestyle event! We're such nerds... But now, we always start out with a simple compliment (just to put people @ ease) and let the conversation flow from there.

BTW, Scandle we're always happy to see other Tame/Moderate couples here... especially when they're as lovely as you! ;-)

Fairview Heights IL
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I find I fail miserably at flirting with people here, on the forums. For the record, most of the people I've gotten to know here would be more than welcome to join me for some sexy fun, but coming across with that message gets lost somehow.

Face-to-face I can be flirtatious if I remember Nic's basic rules - smile, look like you're interested in the other person, listen at least as much as you talk, use body language to indicate interest (first subtle, then build it up as things progress), etc. And above all, have fun - even if it's only with the partner you brought. You never know who is noticing you now and hoping/planning to meet you at a gathering in the future. The fact that you know how to enjoy yourself enhances your appeal.

Sheboygan Falls WI
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"#FunIsAnAsshat"

#Truth

Belle Chasse LA
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#FunIsAnAsshat

I still contend flirting can be learned by even the most shy people. If you see someone you are attracted to and can't work up the nerve to apporach them, move closer, get in their line of sight, smile, laugh, look like you are enjoying yourself and let them approach you. People are drawn to laughter and people who are having fun. If you blend into the scenery, no one may notice you. You do not have to be like a glad-handing politician but if your body language is receptive and approchable, you are half way there.

As for what to say when you actually start chatting? Try to remember a couple of funny stories, maybe your first experience in the LS or even in dating. Nothing breaks the ice like self-depracting humor. Another easy opener is people watching. Point out another person in the room and ask the person you are talking to to tell you what they think their "story" is. And have one in mind when you ask so you can also give an answer and it can be something outrageous (CIA agent here to recruit a sexy spy) or simple (cheater looking for an easy lay).

Smile, it ain't rocket science!

Poland OH
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Apparently I flirt when I am not trying to or at least ppl take it that way. I am easy going fit into any situation and dont have a shy bone in my body. This is taken as flirting to alot of ppl which makes me uncomfortable so I try to be standoffish so I dont have to feel like others think I am "leading them on". Just because I can make others feel at ease, and can laugh and joke, doesnt mean I am "into" you.

Spring TX
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"You may keep me from ever being happy, but you're never gonna stop me from having fun." -- Ani DiFranco

Flat Rock NC
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"Thank you for the plug Rdy."

Not how I roll.

Belle Chasse LA
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R123, are you just flirting with the idea of flirting in public? Or are you seriously talking about doing some serious talking?

I'm not in my fittest form right now, so your sharp wit may slay me, or drop me to my knees. Here: youtube.c om/watch?v=vVg7mtgEqGY

Flat Rock NC
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Thank you for the plug Rdy. lol

Flirting in a public forum is just a matter of a clever turn of phrase...and timing. In person? Start simple. Remind each other to smile. Talk to each other and smile and laugh. Remind each other of something funny or sexy that happened to you and laugh out loud. People are naturally attracted to fun people. You don't have to walk up and introduce yourself if you are too shy, but be open to people approaching you. Be aware of who is watching you and make eye contact, if you like what you see, smile! Body language is just as important. Keep your head up and your body "open". Don't stand facing each other with heads down and arms crossed or at your side. Stand at slight open angle as if waiting for a friend to join the conversation. And SMILE!

Yes there is much, much more to it but trust me, at every club or party I attend, I find the easiest way to start a conversation is to be friendly and approachable. Try it!

Poland OH
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You sound like us lost_j1, we're not good @ breaking the ice but once it is broken we're good to go! Humility is more of our style, but unfortunately most folks mistake us being respectful for dis-interest!

Fairview Heights IL
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TOPIC: The Art of Flirting