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Real or Memorex : Swingers Discussion 56587
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TOPIC: Real or Memorex
Created by: loveallaroundforus
Original Starting post for this thread:
How doyou know if someone is real or not? Can you only trust certified members? If so then certified members hould be able to see private pics? It seems very difficult to want to make contact with someone and worry about being outed. Any thoughts or suggestions out there?

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Interesting question. So far (6 years and counting swinging), we've been very lucky regarding meeting people. As I think about it, there are a few reasons why that is so. First, when reading the profiles, if it doesn't read like someone talking to you, the poster is probably not someone we'd like to meet. We understand that not everyone is Hemingway but the ability to put sentences together and form cogent thoughts in a profile tells us something. Also, reading the profiles with an eye towards unintended wording helps. If you see a lot of first person personal pronouns (I, I'd, me), that should send up a red flag. It's either a single person or someone who hasn't had a discussion with their spouse/significant other yet.

We like to see that pictures exist. Someone posting without any pictures is suspicious to us.

We usually have at least a few email exchanges. While not definitive, you can tell a lot about someone by their writing and style. If their words are interesting and provocative, chances are they will be similar. We have been wrong on occasion but not often!

If necessary, we're not averse to a phone conversation with all parties on board. If we have any suspicions about meeting, a phone conversation can clear up a lot. If we don't get everyone on board, we don't meet.

Finally, we prefer to do local meetings at a restaurant or bar. We're not club people and don't do well there. You often see people posting that they prefer to meet at a club so that if they don't "click" with you, the night isn't wasted. Well, we don't do well in those situations so we don't meet there.

As others have said, treat it as you would meeting someone in a normal situation and use the same cues. All the instincts and knowledge of people you've gained through your life still apply; you're just applying them to people you hope to have sex with!

Good luck and keep posting.

Phil (and the lovely Lea)

Bowie MD
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Welcome LoveAllAround. Determining if someone is "real" is pretty much the same here as it is with the rest of life... to a large degree you have to take precautions and follow your instincts. So be judicious in releasing your private pics for viewing if you are concerned.

The tools provided by this site are helpful, but imperfect. Certifications only certify that someone else has actually met these people, but the lack of a certification does not necessarily mean they are fakes, either. Some people refuse to accept them, for a variety of reasons. Some people are too new to have any. And some fakes with illegal multiple accounts certify themselves (these are usually easy to spot and the webmaster deletes their accounts as soon as it is brought to his attention).

You may find it less stressful to meet potential playmates at real, live venues. Meet-n-Greets and swing clubs are your best bet to make contact with "real" people.

Good luck, and as VALovers said, keep reading the forum... pretty much anything you want to know has been discussed at one time or another.

Have fun! R&M

Hagerstown MD
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Welcome to Forum, and I got me a Forum virgin!

Keep on reading Forum and you will see lots of advice on this subject.

Jim

South Riding VA
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How doyou know if someone is real or not? Can you only trust certified members? If so then certified members hould be able to see private pics? It seems very difficult to want to make contact with someone and worry about being outed. Any thoughts or suggestions out there?

Morgan Hill CA
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TOPIC: Real or Memorex