Need some direction: Swingers Discussion 100817

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TOPIC: Need some direction

Created by: Live_Laugh_Love Original Starting post for this thread:
OK, let me first start by saying I sometimes get a little long winded, however I will try to keep this short. My Husband and I are new to the hole Lifestyle, we have had one encounter about 12 years ago. Liked it and would like to try again. However I am having somewhat of a dilemma. I have some self confidence issues, with my weight. Not looking for compliments or Kudos.. just advise. We (hubby and I) have discussed this many times, I am a size 16 and with in the last 2 years just became this size, was a 20. But when I look in mirror all I see is a large person. Hubby says that I look wonderful, but due to my lack of self worth in the appearance department I feel he is telling me that because he is my husband of 24 years. I mean holly cow, there are some woman here that are older then I, and you could bounce a quarter off their abbs. You guys look wonderful,.. can you at least put some fat pictures up to make some of us feel better,..LOL. Anyway,. my huge fear is that my husband will get all the attention, and honestly it would be over for me, "lifestyle". Any suggestions as what to do,.. ? OK,. one more,... We did join a club in our area, we have been twice. Loved it,. so many nice people. Check your attitude at the door kind of place. I guess my question on this one is, How to start. Hubby is not as shy as I am,.but he doesn't want to appear to forward with out me being ready. Can someone give some advise. And I don't mean do the pelvic thrust to get them to notice you kind of advise that I read in another message,.. although it was funny. In advance I am going to thank you for any advise you can give. I know I wrote a book. Sorry, we know it takes forever to read all of these, we did it yesterday for 5 hours. See how nice he is trying to help me overcome my fears. That's why I want to solve my problems, so that we can start to enjoy. Thanks

Created by: Live_Laugh_Love
Original Starting post for this thread:

OK, let me first start by saying I sometimes get a little long winded, however I will try to keep this short.  My Husband and I are new to the hole Lifestyle, we have had one encounter about 12 years ago. Liked it and would like to try again.  However I am having somewhat of a dilemma.  I have some self confidence issues, with my weight.  Not looking for compliments or Kudos.. just advise.  We (hubby and I) have discussed this many times, I am a size 16 and with in the last 2 years just became this size, was a 20.  But when I look in mirror all I see is a large person. Hubby says that I look wonderful, but due to my lack of self worth in the appearance department I feel he is telling me that because he is my husband of 24 years.  I mean holly cow, there are some woman here that are older then I, and you could bounce a quarter off their abbs.  You guys look wonderful,.. can you at least put some fat pictures up to make some of us feel better,..LOL.  Anyway,. my huge fear is that my husband will get all the attention,  and honestly it would be over for me, "lifestyle".  Any suggestions as what to do,.. ?    

OK,. one more,...

We did join a club in our area, we have been twice. Loved it,. so many nice people.  Check your attitude at the door kind of place.  I guess my question on this one is, How to start.  Hubby is not as shy as I am,.but he doesn't want to appear to forward with out me being ready.  Can someone give some advise.  And I don't mean do the pelvic thrust to get them to notice you kind of advise that I read in another message,.. although it was funny. 

In advance I am going to thank you for any advise you can give. I know I wrote a book. Sorry, we know it takes forever to read all of these, we did it yesterday for 5 hours.  See how nice he is trying to help me overcome my fears.  That's why I want to solve my problems, so that we can start to enjoy.

Thanks

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User Details are only visible to members.	Jack, how did you know that, have you been listening on my phone haha. You are right. I do have friends that are "no maintenence" chicks haha. I'm the TOTAL opposite, completely girlie girl foo foo diva. Oh well, thats just me. I am honestly high maintenence and spoil my temple. However, there is beauty in all women who are confident and in love with themselves. Shell
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23618 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I have yet to meet the woman who doesn't feel that (pick one or more) A) she's too heavy/slender, B) her hair isn't 'right', C) her breasts are too large/small/saggy, D) her tummy/behind is 'too much'. Honestly, as a male, I can't recall the last time that I was turned off by any of that. I think I can safely speak for many, but not all, men when I say that I pay a lot more attention to the 'chemistry' and personality than the figure and the hair. That's not to say that none of that has any impact, just that many seem to over rate it's importance. Sure, I like a nice figure. Would I leave someone with really great chemistry for a Barbie with no chemistry? No way! My advice would be that you not stress over it. If you're nicely dressed, neat and clean, let people accept you as you are...a nice person with interests similar to theirs. Do you really care about someone else if they can only focus on your resemblance, or lack of, to Barbie? J(&D)
Fairview Heights IL			Username hidden (629 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	the picture on the sidewalk is very hot.Shows the confidence , the look, the smile. just hot. Define yourself and you will be great
Sarasota FL			Username hidden (2070 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Diamond, aren't the mexican pizzas to die for ha? Pepsi is my personal vice. I allow myself 1 20oz. per week. Shell
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23618 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Wayne, speaking for myself I was not offended. I think we all know that if either dzzy or myself were offended there would have been no room for assumption ha. We pretty much say what we are thinking. No, I know I was just asking for clarification on what you meant in regards to your using the word plastic. Perhaps I should have been more clear in my question. I will be honest that if I'm called a thinny, barbie or if someone thinks I'll break in half one more time.....ha. No, I was not offended. LOL. Shell
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23618 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Ill tell you too, working out does wonders for me. Before I start my extravaganza of getting ready I always work out. It makes everything feel nice and tight....and gives me an amazing confidence boost. It works for me. Also my routine of getting ready does wonders. I always finish and blow a kiss to the woman looking back at me in the mirror. Shell
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23618 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	LLL and kissus...welcome to the forums! Hope you both enjoy yourselves here. MrD
Chilton WI			Username hidden (546 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I will say that a lot of women start out in the lifestyle a bit hesitant as to how they "measure up" to others. here's my story: Our first party/club event...I fretted all the way there that I might be the "fattest" one, etc. And when I met a great couple there, she (who is tall, blonde, slimmer) said, "Oh my god, I worried the whole way here that I'd be the 'ugly one' in the room." So you see? There are times we all feel "less than." This lifestyle, however, has been a GREAT ego boost, confidence boost, esteem boost! I always feel better about myself after an encounter. You just need some patience, mostly patience with yourself. You'll meet all sorts of people with all sorts of preferences, and the compliments and genuine interest will be boosts. Relax. Find something to wear that you feel pretty, sexy and comfortable in, and just enjoy it. You'll also find that men in club situations are not going to be too aggressive...they wait for come ons from you, for the most part. So, make eye contact, talk to other people, and when you hear their stories, you'll find that we're all not so different after all. From someone else who is also longwinded on here, GIna
San Antonio TX			Username hidden (5609 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Live_Laugh_Love, You are honestly putting too much stress on yourself. The fun on the lifestyle is meeting people of variety. If everyone were ken and barbie it would be a boring lifestyle. Be proud of yourself, the beauty of a woman comes from her personality, and curves. Variety is a spice of life, and in this lifestyle there is a lot of variety to choose from. If you were to go to a swingers club, you'd see that they don't discriminate people based on size, or shape, everyone is welcome to enjoy the lifestyle no matter your size, shape or skin color. On a side note, I think you look very sexy, and should strut your stuff as a previous poster said.
Palm Beach Gardens FL			Username hidden (188 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Thin does not equal to plastic, no? I assure you I'm not plastic ha. Shell
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23618 post)

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TOPIC: Need some direction

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