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TOPIC: How did it start
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LiveitUp: Are you still in the military? If deployed again, would you let your wife play alone?

I find military swinging kinda hot.

Wyomissing PA
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(32 posts)
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LiveItUp: welcome to the forums!

Manville NJ
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We are very new at this. I was in the military and deployed to Afghanistan and my wife and I would exchange explicit emails every so often. In one of those emails she mentioned the possibility of going to a swinger club, or having a threesome with another female. By the time I got back home a few months later, she had ruled out singles at all, but was still interested in having public sex and/or playing with another couple. After a few weeks home, we became free members on this site and a few others. We eventually started talking to another newbie couple and stopped using the sites altogether. We talked to them exclusively for a few months. We eventually met them and had a fun time, but we did not play with them. We are still not sure why nothing happened, because we seemed to have hit it off with them pretty well. I think everyone may have been too nervous to initiate anything. She is more pessimistic than I am, and she thinks the other wife may not have been interested in her for some reason. My wife's very introverted, and the other wife was nice, but not as talkative and sociable as her husband. Honestly, I think that was the big issue between them. Most people she talks to are kind of sociable and outgoing, it counteracts her being a quiet introvert. A few weeks after that meeting we got paid memberships on this site and another. We learned a few lessons: 1. Do not put all your eggs in one basket, 2. It's probably much better to keep the texting/emailing to a minimum and meet in person early as possible after a short screening of the other couple, no need to do that more than a few times before meeting somewhere in public with no expectations.

Elizabethtown KY
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Donnell: My Sister told Us one day on they phone about Swinger Clubs and let Us know it was a Couple of Them in Maryland. We mutually decided to attend with the understanding that We just wanted to see if We could watch Live Sex. It was such a Turn On to watch Others make out and have Sex, so then We would get a Room by Ourselves and have Sex.

Edgewood MD
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In my post I wrote "The wife was not ready. On the period and not cool with the chick. She was a creepy weirdo. But we did it. We showed up. We had balls" to avoid misunderstanding I did not mean we went through with something we were not both into I merely meant we actually showed up. Nothing happened. I mentioned that because in our limited and brief LS experience - most don't even show up. That is all. :)

Vancouver WA
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I (husband) brought it up. Scariest moment of my life. Wife was visibly upset. Thought I wanted to cheat and that everything was changing. Kind of pointed out the obvious - if cheting were the goal then I wouldn't tell her about it! LOTS of talking ensued. In the interim communication increased 1000 fold about EVERYTHING we became closer and more open. The sex got hotter and inhibitions flew out the window.

We started off with a Craig's list ad. Actually were contacted by a unicorn! We went to a bar and met her and went back to her place. The wife was not ready. On the period and not cool with the chick. She was a creepy weirdo. But we did it. We showed up. We had balls.

A few weeks later we went to a free tour of a sex club near our home. Sat in the parking lot for awhile. I was scared to go in. The wife? Raring to go. In we went. She led the way. Back in the car she was totally into joining and thought it looked fun. We joined and stayed. Saw and heard many great sexy things - fucked like animals.

Then came the shoes. The clothes. The nails. The hair. She was experiencing a complete coming out. She loves to dress slutty and go out. Then came the stories and admissions. She likes girls and was much wilder than I had known in her past. There are zero barriers in our bedroom and our sex life has exploded.

Then one night at the club a local group was there for an outing. A group called Sex Positive Portland (Oregon). They specialize in open, respectful, non threatening, consensual communication and adult activities. We were approached and met with several members. One gentleman took an interest in the wife after meeting us. We all ended up on the dance floor. She ended up kissing us and groping us both. VERY hot. Eventually getting the hand job of a lifetime from him resulting in her first g-spot orgasm. She finished it off by blowing him on the dance floor.

That was followed by a soft 4 way, and a same room encounter with another couple. Just sex in the same room. No intra couple touching. Which was admittedly pretty hot though tame. We're headed toward our first full swap and many other things we are ready to try. Slow and steady we are taking things as they come and enjoying the ride. We regularly go to two clubs and two different meet and greets. We also joined Sex Positive Portland and have attended a few of their events including a class called "Mapping The Vulva" where I learned the skills to give my wife the same earth shattering orgasms she had the first night we ventured from voyeur to participant. We have met some very cool people along the way. And some creepy weirdos. But it's OUR adventure and always a lot of fun.

It has categorically changed our lives for the better. It sounds counter intuitive but opening our relationship to sexual activity with others has brought us closer together. Weird. Though middle aged parents and suburbanites Sunday through Friday, on Saturday nights the heels come out, the slutty clothes go on and we go out for OUR night. Don't wait up. We'll be late.........

So much fun. This Saturday? A club outing with Sex Positive Portland. The theme? Naughty School Girl. We already have the outfit and shoes ready to go. We enjoy finding delicious new outfits for her to wear together. Never liked shopping before, but that kind of shopping I can do!

Vancouver WA
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Welcome to the fora NewInDFW

As KF said, take it slow and enjoy the ride. You are certain to get a lot of response to your fantasy so take your time and vet the guys (as that is what you will get the most response from initially) and choose one who you feel comfortable with and will respect your boundaries. Best choice will be someone with certs and a paid member who is willing to meet for drinks with no play at first.

Good luck and have fun! And let us pervs know how it goes! lol

~scamp (he)

New Orleans LA
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I first started swinging when i was twenty. My almost girlfriend and i where sitting down having a beer and she looked me deep into my eyes and said" Dan I am bi and i want you to take me to a swing party"

Being the worldly man that i was at that age...I responded with "huh what is bi and you like swing dancing?"

We went to Barry and Shells the local swingers club the next night and had a ball.

We had a lot of fun sex in the next couple of years but we never got close enough as a couple to move in together.

I met my wife a few years later. She was a sexual as the above woman, i was just out of college and starting my own business and she was busy working as well, swinging never came up. I noticed that she really enjoy the attention from other men and loved to dress so that the men would look at her.

About three months after we moved in together i mentioned swinging and she got a big smile and said...you dont mind if i have sex with other men?

Its been a very happy marriage, with three kids and lots of very fun sex. To this day she still spends time with and old boyfriend from college, they meet once a year at the industry's annual conference.

Ukiah CA
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@ Newin

Welcome to the wild side......enjoy, go slow, continue talking always, you're in this together and that's what makes is special.

Kernersville NC
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We're still at the very (very) beginning stages, but it went like this:

A couple months back I came across the results of a scientific survey that described sexual fantasies by gender. I asked her which ones my she liked, and she admitted that a threesome or foursome was something she'd considered before. We discussed what that would be like, how I'd feel about her and another man (excited, to say the least!), and so on. Just talking about it sent our sex life through the roof! We've talked about it since then occasionally, and yesterday she admitted she's ready for some M/F oral play. You can't imagine (well, yes you can) how excited I was to hear it. So, we signed up for this profile and now our journey begins...

Bedford TX
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TOPIC: How did it start