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TOPIC: Bad experiences
Created by: shooter18t
Original Starting post for this thread:
i am sure that we are not the only ones in this lifestyle to have a bad experience.What I would like to know is how do you get back on track after a bad experience.Or do we just forget about this lifestyle and go back to pretending that monogamy is natural? Any body have a bad time but after a few years were able to get back on the horse again...

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Your mileage may vary.

South Riding VA
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LOL curious! I suspect a lot of people could say the same thing!

Still, when we got married the first time, we were in love with that person. People change over time, and not necessarily in compatible directions. No matter how much you started out loving someone, if after 15-20 years you suddenly find yourselves with mutually exclusive goals for your lives, you have to make a tough decision to either end your marriage or one of you will have to live the "life of quiet desperation."

South Riding VA
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Expo, couldn't have said it better, LOL.

Center Valley PA
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yeah once in a blue moon the fuck and flee is great . you get passion without emotional ties.There is no expectation with anyone and no commitment to call or arrange another date or evening. Hell what I love about the fuck and flee most of all : watching suzy work her magic at a club or party to see her confidence stride and glide.Seeing her take total control over what she wants to happen and make it happen. Its not like she goes over and says hi my name is mary , he is john our real names richie and suzy, lets go.There is a conversation, time to get to know one another at least a name if your lucky and the right name! LOL ,purely physical attraction. I am not sure there is any better sex when its purely physical animal lust.you let your mind go, only thoughts are about sex and what you wish to expereince. your clothes are a mess on the floor on the chair one shoe over there another on top of the bed. Kissing, touching,sweat rolling down a brow every inch of body being swallowed up. its very intense,very erotic,very different daring sex. There are sometimes I am just tired of trying the mental connection the cerebral approach when I just want uninhibited ,unbriddled sex.

Sarasota FL
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Not with us you don't! You have to stick around and face the music! LOL

South Riding VA
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What's wrong with "fuck and flee"? We enjoy an occasional "fuck and flee" outting, LOL.

Center Valley PA
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While "fuck and flee" may be the approach of some couples, all the couples we know in our area are friends with each other. In this case the safety is in numbers. If you have 3 or 4 couples you like to swing with, you just can't possibly spend so much time with one of them that you get too close. If you rotate 4 couples and swing even twice a month, that's a total of 24 times a year or only 6 times a year with any one of those couples. And a lot of people don't have time to swing more than once a month, which would reduce that to only 3 times a year per couple.

Just keep a handful of couples among your "regulars" and you won't have much risk of anyone "falling in love."

South Riding VA
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Thank you Expo...great advice..they are some of the things I have mentioned to my wife...keeping a distance from our swinging partners is the only way to go for us

St Andrews Canada
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really dpeends on how strong your relationship is with your wife. What we would recommend would be this.Stay away from relationships with another couple.Remember this it always takes 2 to tangle.She had an attachment for this gy who also had an attachment for her and said things to her that mnade her feel special. When I say stay away from relationship I mean it this way ./ Go to on premise clubs, meet a couple,hook up with them and go HOME.We call this the fuck and flee.You meet a couple that lives a great distance from you, to do this you can't go to a home town club but one that is an hour or 2 away.This does 2 different things. One you get your occassional different along with some outstanding sexual adventures without emotional ties.This wil give ehr confidence in doing the right thing and also give you the play time you grave If this is something that your wife can't give you then by all means look into doing something different for the next ten years. otherwise your marriage will be kaput.

Sarasota FL
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You are so right...in hindsight...I should have let her dissolve the relationship with the other guy on her own.That might have made a difference..she told me after quite a while had passed that she would have ended it herself but I jumped the gun...guess I blew it myself

St Andrews Canada
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TOPIC: Bad experiences