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Are kids effecting your sex life, or have they in the past : Swingers Discussion 2104131011
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FORUMSGeneral DiscussionsGetting StartedAre kids effecting your sex life, or have they in the past
TOPIC: Are kids effecting your sex life, or have they in the past
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We have two kids and it is tough to do all the things we want to do, but we manage. It is slow going but that's life and we enjoy it as much as we can.

New Braunfels TX
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It's not devious, it "the power of suggestion," lol.

Redford MI
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I recall having those times. We roughed our way through it though. Now our kids are getting older and we have a little more "us" time.

Toledo OH
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During our kids' younger years, when we were rarely able to get out, and were exhausted with my nightshift job and us trying to get our bakery up-n-running as well, our sex life diminished. Because of work taking up soooo much time, we used any time left over to be with the kiddos. Although we tried to keep somewhat of a sex-life, we both felt that any awake time was better spent with the children. Looking back, I'm glad we played it that way, and I wouldn't change it. There will be more and more time for extracurricular activities as they grow and become more independent, so worry not. We've learned how to plant the seed in their heads to ask my folks if they can spend the night. We don't tell them to ask, but earlier in the week, in conversation, we will randomly converse, in their presence, about how long it's been since they've stayed at Nonna's house. Or mention what a bummer it is that we don't have cable because there's a Halloween special on Saturday night. The kids don't realize they've been "brainwashed," and by the end of the week, they will, on their own, ask to spend the night at my parents' house.

Redford MI
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The kids years are for sure dominated by the kids' needs, but they fly by so fast you can't remember it. And then the empty-nester years begin, and oh does the sex - and swinging - get good! :-)

Jim

South Riding VA
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DnJ- I don't know how old your kiddos are but we call the years until our kids were preschoolers "the dark years." I missed sex and intimacy but the idea of one more person needing something from me at the end of a long day of our kids needing me in a very physical way was just too much for me. Looking back now, we were both pretty miserable and neither one of us felt that the other understood our feelings or needs.

It was absolutely wonderful to make it through to the other side and we comment regularly on how thankful we are that those times are past. Good luck to you.

Cincinnati OH
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the only time our TV in the bedroom is on, is if I'm watching a dvd while folding wash on the bed. Its not even hooked to the dish. On occasion we will pop in a disc of homemade porn of me with a SM. No computers in the bedroom, just my phone in case of emergencys with the family.

Neither of us are TV watchers really but we do get sucked in by the forums we are on. But I get cranky if I don't have sex often! So we decided just like we schedule other things we would schedule computer/tv off us on time.

PG

Louisville KY
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We try very hard to tear ourselves away from anything electronic by 9 p.m. so that we can be together, awake usually, for that hour or so before falling asleep. Being empty nesters without childcare responsibilities makes this easy, but there was a time when we were not creating this reconnection opportunity for each other.

It's a matter of determining what is most important in the moment. Sometimes there really is something on-line that needs to have attention paid to it, but usually there is nothing that can't be handled just as effectively the next day. Being with my husband both physically and mentally is top priority during the hour of "our" time.

Sheboygan Falls WI
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for us it wasn't as much the kids as the computers. Our kids are in bed by 8:30. So we now go to bed at 10 (although some nights I've just come home from dancing for several hours) 10-11 is "our" time when he is home during the week. Most nights that time includes sex, even on nights where we were too tired. That time whether it is spent fucking or not is more important to us then tv or computer. We get up at 6am I run two business both of which are physical, plus have to dance several hours a day coming up with new acts.

We also get to go out together often. We are blessed that my mom isn't far away and will usually watch the girls for us so we can go out as late as we want or stay out overnight at a hotel.

PG

Louisville KY
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KD, good point! I forgot to mention date night. We were encouraged to do that, too, and even though we didn't manage to have a date night every week, "forcing" ourselves to get a babysitter and head out for adult fun was well worth the effort.

Sheboygan Falls WI
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TOPIC: Are kids effecting your sex life, or have they in the past