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Biggest barrier to working out : Swingers Discussion 1750781021
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TOPIC: Biggest barrier to working out
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"over a period of time, discussions on a topic get twisted "

I posted a light comment that YOU turned into something all together different in a matter of an afternoon. Whatever Shibby, Carrie is right you want to fight.

There isn't anything wrong with being hit on, which is not the same as what you are talking about. You are talking about being raped and harrassed etc. No one has to remain a victim.

"So, all men have this great thing called impulse control and will only hit on women who appear interested? "

Not all men, just as not all men are rapists who harrass women at every opputunity.

Someone needs to tell that 12 year old girl that not all men are rapist and pedophiles. That every man who looks at her, thinks she's pretty or talks to her isn't going to rape her. That she has the right to go to any gym, store, bank or where ever she wants to go. Someone sure as fuck needs to make sure she knows it's possible to regain her self esteem, and recover to the best of her ability from rape.

Sexually harrassment doesn't just happen to rape victims.

I probably would have caused a scene at walmart.

New Castle PA
 
 
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"You said this toyz after all of the shit had gone down."

Yea Shibby I posted it the next day after this topic all blew up, ya know after I came home from work.

No I have never seen that kind of harrassment at the gym. Has anyone else posting in this thread seen it? I doubt it. No one at the gym I go to is swearing or asking anyone if they want to fuck. Nor are the men packing up and following women through the gym. The gym is a public place with rules and such, so is walmart, you don't have to put up with that shit anywhere. Refusing to do things and go places you want to because you might get hit on keeps a woman a victim.

"Ok then - but if a woman gets harassed by a guy at a gym she isn't necessarily looking for it WHICH WAS MY POINT ALL ALONG!!!"

This is where you are way out in left field.......Harrassed by a man at the gym and unwanted male attention are not one in the same unless you consider being even looked at harrassment. Geez unwanted male attention in a gym could be considered the dude who always wants the machine next to yours. Who looks at you too much and tries to start up conversation with you.

"your anecdote to Carrie was that it must have been obvious that she was serious about working out so that must be why she has never been hit on."

Yup thats what I said, you don't think men can tell when a woman is interested in flirting around and when she is not? Why are you reading so much into something that was stated so lightly. UnWanted Male Attention not harrassment and rape.

This has turned into male bashing, many woman are aggressive too.

New Castle PA
 
 
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Most men are almost always on the prowl for women. Some show it; others don't. I had a man tell me that a man will find a reason to fuck a woman so you can be fine, ugly, slim, overweight, etc. there is some man somewhere who is willing to fuck you. Another example. I was speaking with a male friend about the enhanced bodybuilders (steroid girls) and he admitted that from the back you can't tell whether they are men or women so to avoid that squared off face, you'd have to put a bag over her face and fuck her from the back! So, I don't think women have to ask for anything. Some men are jerks and get too aggressive so you have to check em. The Wal-Mart incident was a case for a security call. I also go to Wal-Mart late at night or in the early morning hours and have never encountered that situation. I think you handled it well. Those little dick assholes should find a better way to spend their time.

Vero Beach FL
 
 
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"it was pretty much implied that if a woman gets hit on in a gym that she was "asking for it" or in your words she falls in this class "woman who are there looking for male attention" my words - asking for it, your words - looking for it. Pretty much the same."

Woman looking for male attention would not consider getting that attention negative. It's not the same as unwanted male attention. They are looking for it, not the same as asking to be raped.

"No one wanted to admit that it is possible to be serious about working out and still get hit on because that would have ruined the passive aggressive remark that was made against a certain person."

I believe I said clearly thats it's possible for anyone to be hit on anywhere, what ever activity. Oh I see it's not about the topic but a fight over a comment that some felt was passive aggressive toward another member.

"(I will still hold to my belief that both are wrong and produce the same feelings from the victim if the harassment was severe enough also taking into account a history of sexual abuse)"

Not all woman consider being hit on to be wrong. You are putting a very negative light on being hit on, it does not make one a victim in itself. I take it, you took my comments as negative, I remember being single and being on the prowl so to say, I had alot of fun. If I wanted some male attention I would think the gym would be a great place to look for it, there is nothing wrong with that.

New Castle PA
 
 
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Ya know what I think Shibby, I think the worst part of being raped would be the manipulation and/or force that takes away a person's ability to say no and have control over their own body.

I don't know why you went down this road, trying to make it out like I said women deserved getting hit on at the gym and equating it to rape victims deserving to be raped. I surely never said either of those things.

I am fortunate that I don't look at every person who hits on me as a rapist.

I tried to say this once already, the majority of hitting on I see going on at the gym is done by woman to men. Thats my experience. Never heard cat calls inside the gym, never seen men doing and saying the things I've seen women do..........

I also said it's very easy to stay to yourself at the gym and not get involved with other people.

New Castle PA
 
 
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I just woke up and had to jump into the fray: I think it's safe to say that I am serious about my training. I train in full make-up, jewelry and phat ass work out clothes -- Nike, Under Armour, Hard Tail (yoga year), Adidas along with my David Yurman and Pandora bracelets along with a Tag Heur watch! We have to stop passing judgment and let people live. Now that I am determined to get my pro card, I wear all that stuff along with one of those bands around my waist to sweat my abs which is covered by a long sleeve top and when I do cardio, I have on a hoodie and sometimes I put the hood portion on. I have been accused in the past of wanting to be a glamour girl -- I do -- however, I am also serious in the gym and don't mind breaking a sweat with my MAC make-up on! Men are going to be attracted to women and some women will be jealous (haters) that's life. As far as feeling uncomfortable when men make remarks inside and/or outside the gym....let me say this....I used to wonder why women got so freaked out about rape and didn't just get over it until someone very close to me made me feel violated and that's w/o even touching me.....I was never in that person's company again until the day he died. Rape is foul and absolutely nothing can compare to that I am now sure. In closing -- straight men are attracted to women and even some not so straight; if you're attractive and have a decent or great body, it's a given that you're going to be hit on...some women would be happy to have this problem. I know a few (lol)!

Vero Beach FL
 
 
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Aww thanks Spade ;).... it's my favorite room in the house

Windermere FL
 
 
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I just ignore those that seek to fight. Makes fora more interesting.

As has been said a million times by others, "I just post where I like, what I like, when I like". I would "think" others do the same. WHy would you waste your precious time on those you dislike?

If all this over me doing a 40 min workout for butts and thighs heck I better not tell you I joined a gym today lol

Mantoloking NJ
 
 
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Oh, btw, Cayne, Very hot pic of you in the kitchen.

Rochester NY
 
 
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mmmmm.....rape

Rochester NY
 
 
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TOPIC: Biggest barrier to working out