115
Swinging and BDSM : Swingers Discussion 154413101
Busy Swingers Forum - everything you always wanted to know about swingers.
SwingLifeStyle Swingers Personal Ads. | SwingLifeStyle Swingers Clubs

Busy Swingers Forum

Everything you always wanted to know about swingers.

Create A Free Account

HELP
FORUMSGeneral DiscussionsBDSMSwinging and BDSM
TOPIC: Swinging and BDSM
Created by: Soinloveagain
Original Starting post for this thread:
HI! Danny and Leslie here, we are new to SLS but not new to the LS. We have been swinging for a little over a year and we love it, but we are little confused by the bias or discrimination perhaps between swingers and bdsm people. We have been living in a committed D/s relationship for over 17 years, I (Danny) am her dom. I think it's so funny how you hear... "those bdsm people are freaks" or "swinging, that is just gross". This from supposedly sexually liberated, intelligent people. While we are new to SLS we are on another swing site and in our profile we are open about our D/s and you'd be surprised how many women approach us who are curious about D/s. Isn't it a little duplicitious to look down on someone elses kink?

We are new here and don't have any friends here yet, check us out!

GoTo Page: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 ... More 
 1 to 10 of 70   End
User Details are only visible to members.
We agree with that too Jason, we are not talking about the true newbes cause we all was that once and know it can be a bit crazy at time or a lot for others. We are talking about the ones we say one thing just so they can get with us and then they want the sex but than said we really don't do most of that other stuff or there profile says one thing but when you meet it's something else. We meet a lot of awesome couples & singles on sls but we also meet a small amount of fake ass couples on sls just the same. As for the newbes cum we well make you feel right at home in no time lol

Bronx NY
Username hidden
(8 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
It seems to me that the most successful approach is to take beginners where they are at and play and teach at their level. What sometimes freaks people out is that we expect newbies to play at an experienced level. The experienced couple should structure play that nurtures a beginners interest. Trust and confidence must grow before any serious play can occur. So maybe we sometimes forget that beginners are just that, and should be approached that way. Sure it takes more time, but when you can nurture a new couple into bdsm, they can be very grateful.

Green Bay WI
Username hidden
(177 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
Yes kinddraggon, do get us wrong it's not with every body we do this with, so we can keep our selfs in check if need be and have fun. It's when your around the couples that show boat but look good doing it and you can have fun but when it comes down to the real stuff you said now its like "really" than you find your self in a party of just or most fake couples but you can spot the real ones, but we also have help out couples understand the BDSM fun and a few like it but most would say not for me. So not all the time but so couples once they find out what your into they go into kid mode and need a little team of fake couples that do cookie cut sex and talk about others it has happen to us to find out that at the end it all comes back to bite you on the ass. This is why we love our real couples & singles, cause you guys are open free and some things we my not like to do but cause we real we still love you for it, if all of us think and help and do this we can 100000% weed out the fake couples or singles out, so we all can just have a awesome what every time.

Bronx NY
Username hidden
(8 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
Every one must understand that as a D/s couple, what my yes or no is, may be the other couples no or yes and even if that is the case the rules is what was set and you go with them and that's that. But if you find the couple or person that your no's & yes's our the same than its even better, and hat with anything in life. So you hot couples tku for in boxing us and have a D/s BDSM fun.

H&a/sub

Bronx NY
Username hidden
(8 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
We find that we are a bit much for most couples, we love are swing life and our BDSM life too we have a very D/s relationship when it come to the sex part in our life's. It's very hard to find couples that understand what is about to happen and the role of things we are very hard core so it can be a bit of a downer to play half of your self and have fun vs having fun with a couple(s) that know what the deal is and my very sexy sub with is a cryer & begs you to stop and if you do than its kind of done she will not play with you cause you stop lol but we did find a couple that we go all in and it's awesome when we do and it's so hot as to.... You just got to be there to understand.

H&a/sub

Bronx NY
Username hidden
(8 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
And then we have to get those people to understand that its OK for people in that type of relationship with the husband being the sub, and the Wife the Domme. Same type of discrimination there.

Weston FL
Username hidden
(47 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
Our circle of friends that enjoy both continues to grow. Once people understand that bdsm and swinging aren't all or none activities it makes it easier to take as much or as little of each one and combine them into something that works for them.

Center Valley PA
Username hidden
(9003 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
It's funny we have friends on both sides of the coin, but none that do both. We started a swingers 'n kink group in the swing club we managed and did manage to get about 20 couples attending regularly. Many of whom saw quite a few of the things they were already doing in the bedroom were some of those very same things, us BDSM folk do.

I think many of the problems are lack of education, especially from the swingers to the BDSMers. We heard many of times from vanilla swingers that BDSM was just a license to beat your partner, we tried to explain it and let them know it was not just about whips and chains, but many still didn't get it, or wouldn't even take the time to try and open their minds to something new.

My Master/hubby is great at fire play, and he did demos at our club quite often. Was amazed at how many swingers actually tried it/ bottomed for it, once they saw him do some with me and asked me a million questions. There were even some who would come in on a Saturday night and ask him if he would pull the fire kit out. So sometimes I think unless people get a good understanding that it's not all about terrible pain and can be a lot of fun, they are afraid of it. They have to be willing though to have an open mind and at least hear what else is out there even if they never try it.

Lake Village IN
Username hidden
(441 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
We are a married couple who are also Master/slave (not Master/doormat..lol). We are also swingers (quality not quantity). We have found that if we are upfront with people and explain to them that even though we are D/s they do not have to be, most are simply curious and ask us questions. Sure, there are those that have said, "You're not beating my wife!" to which we (He) has replied, "Whew! Glad we got that cleared up". (This couple are some of our best friends now..lol..and nope, never beat her once!)

All kidding aside though, each "kink" has it's own group of people who are closed minded. Some who are only into spanking think S/M is nasty and some who enjoy B/D think spanking is horrid. It is human nature to be judgemental about something and some people are that way about these things.

Swingers, D/s couples, M/s couples, Spankers.....most are just fun loving, NORMAL people who are simply looking for friends to hang out with and enjoy.

Spydercpl (the she half :)

Poinciana FL
Username hidden
(1 post)
User Details are only visible to members.
are swingers closed minded.....if its not something they like ,pretty much.and you know I don't bs.....BS

Kingston TN
Username hidden
(1991 posts)
GoTo Page: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 ... More 
 1 to 10 of 70   End
TOPIC: Swinging and BDSM