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Her Submissive Desires : Swingers Discussion 2138251031
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TOPIC: Her Submissive Desires
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FC - There are many ways to approach BDSM... you don't necessarily have to jump straight into an intense scene. You can start out with something as simple as having him tie your hands together over your head, or making him direct you while you masturbate... anything that has him exert control, no matter how slight, is good. You can always crank up the intensity when you feel the need, but it's very difficult to recover from starting out with too much intensity.

If you're the more dominant partner in the day to day life, you could always try something akin to "You're the boss in the bedroom, I'm the boss everywhere else".

Chances are, though... if, as you've mentioned, he has a demanding job where he's always in charge, his lack of interest might be more about not wanting to be in control "when i'm relaxing"... that's going to be difficult to overcome.

Kalona IA
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Favorite... First is to talk to hubby about it. If he does not want to or cannot help you explore the next step would be to see if he is ok with you exploring your submissive desires with someone else. He can certainly be there, maybe he does not want to be. How much he is involved is up to the two of you to decide. This is where being swingers help because many are used to having other people involved.

San Jose CA
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I was hoping to actually read someones reply about how they were able to act on their submissive desires within a relationship that didn't have that dynamic already in place.

As the very dominant female half, I relate to what the OP is saying in that when someone is the alpha in a relationship that functions quite will in that regard, it's incredibly hard to even imagine submitting to the less alpha partner. Mr. Favorite is a wonderful partner who exhibits dominant qualities in his life and job every day but doesn't care to be sexually dominant. While I would like to play the submissive, it just doesn't feel right to either one of us. Even the domiest dom in domland won't be able to teach him that. I totally agree with whoever ( actually I think it was BOTH parties) said that that personality trait can't be taught when it comes to sexual dominance. You either have it or you don't.

Hoping someone else will chime in with how they successfully managed to satisfy their desires as well as keep their partner involved, cuckolding isn't for either one of us.


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Seduction Apparently you do not read my posts very carefully. Here is what I said early on in this thread

"I did not say that you can create dominance where dominance does not exist. But simply because one has dominant DNA does not create an ability to be a good or successful dominant."

I don't see where you get to be the judge of the quality of anyone else's dominance and submission. To each his own. If one feels they are a dominant then they have a lot to learn about how to express their dominance effectively and safely. One is not born with this ability.

Green Bay WI
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This will be my last post on the subject, out of respect for the OP's request:

Jason, you can say anything that you'd like, you can invent and imagine any fuzzy bubbalee that make you feel all gooey and warm on the inside. You are either dominant, or you are not. Dominant is not a trait, it's a personality, it's how a person carries themselves, thinks, interacts, decides, every single day. A dominant does not have a switch that can be turned off or on. It's either there, or it isn't. Dominance, does not equate to beating people, it does not equal to barking orders, or a set of steps that you memorized and are now carrying out like a good little pupil. It's simply not.

I can teach you to throw a mean single tail, I can teach you to bullwhip, I can teach you to cut, I can teach you needles, I can teach you breath play, I can teach you ritualistic invisibility, I can teach you any physical aspect of scening in the BDSM arena. I can not teach you dominance. ANYONE that claims that they can is simply ignorant.

You can call me judgmental, you can refer to me as someone that is not fun to play with (as if I'd even entertain the thought of playing with you), you can call me anything you'd like if that's what brings you comfort. Reality though is entirely different, and no dominant worth his hide would ever attempt to change this fact.

Good day. .the-estate.co m/

Rumson NJ
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Dominant man, The way my submissive has learned is by experience, trial and error, training with others, reading, playing and finding out what works. Contrary to what others have suggested, I feel a submissive can learn from others and can discover and develop their submissive nature. We have found that including a wide variety of other opinions, and types of play one can discover and nurture Not all things work equally well for either dominants or submissives so it is a path of discovery and experience. I for one enjoy the wide variety of diversity that is found in the bdsm community.

Green Bay WI
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Seduction You are the most judgmental person. There is no reason to disparage others path. You don't sound like very much fun to play with. It sounds like the only way to be a proper dominant is to do it your way. Have fun. I just hope others who are just discovering their dominance don't run into you as you will just put them down for not being your type of dominant. Apparently you are not even willing to help others learn. Very short sighted. It is fine to have your own path as others are free to find theirs. To suggest that others don't have or understand dominance is arrogance and hubris. Perhaps grace and consideration for others choices and opinions is too difficult for you. It is easier to put other down because you think you know how it is. You know how it is for you, but you don't know others and you have no basis for judging their capacity as a dominant. Yet you persist in insisting that the rest of us have only invalid opinions.

Green Bay WI
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And that is precisely why there is so much of what is known as fluff BDSM, feel free to carry on.

Rumson NJ
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Seduction Thanks for not mentoring anyone. You wouldn't be any good at it. If you think you can't then you can't.

I have been mentored and I have mentored others. Just because you can't see it doesn't mean it isn't possible. You are are the one who is limited by your thoughts.

Green Bay WI
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These natures can be revealed. Therein lies the learning.

Daniels MD
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TOPIC: Her Submissive Desires