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TOPIC: Can_a_Submissive_Woman_Also_Be_a_Feminist?
Created by: Jason685
Original Starting post for this thread:
Or can a feminist woman be sexually submissive? This is a big issue for some. Does feminism preclude being sexually submissive OR should feminism give all women the right to choose their sexual preferences? Many are conflicted and confused on this point. Here is an interesting article on this topic. Here is one quote: "Submissive kinky women are far from the shrinking violets that BDSM's critics have characterized them as being and in many cases, they are women who know exactly what they want in a relationship." This article includes quotes from some of the top women in BDSM and sexual freedom. It is very well articulated. I think you may learn something.

Alternet d*t o*g - written by Alex Henderson entitled "Women who like to be dominated in bed. Talking to BDSM submissives."

I find that a lot of swingers are confused or conflicted about bdsm because it seems so contrary to what we are being taught about how to treat others. It seems so un-PC. Understanding and accepting our bdsm urges give us the freedom to explore and enjoy whatever is our particular desire. This article and others that I will be recommending can give you insight and perhaps the courage to step out and explore your fantasies.

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Really did not think the question needed asking George

Royal Palm Beach FL
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Of course she can. As stated in other posts she can be submissive in the bedroom if she chooses and completely different elsewhere.

Knightdale NC
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sure they can, just like a CEO can be a submissive, I know several, and many more are...it's just another party of your personality or ego that you can choose to embrace or ignore... You don't have to be submissive in all aspects of life just a chosen select few. Furthermore, you don't have to be submissive all the time, you can be a switch. For instance my husband loves being sexually submissive to me most of the time and submissive to the single guys we play with but in reality outside of sex he is a dominate personality not is a bad way but as an engineer he must know what he is doing or people could get hurt being that he is in the medical device industry and even when we decide what we are doing around the house we collaborate on everything from colors to organization. But in the bedroom he is my little slut! ;-) which is REALLLY HOTTTT at least I think so

Livermore CA
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Rabbits post is spot on.

Although for me slightly different, as much as I love my man I will never truly be sub to him, its not the way our relationship works. He is too laid back for that role, and knows all too well all the issues from my past.

Louisville KY
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Well said sweetie and I agree 100%. Once a trust is established, many strong women love not having to be in control for a change.

~scamp

New Orleans LA
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I am most certainly both. I am completely submissive to my Sweetie--well, I do have a habit of being a brat BUT that just keeps things interesting! lol I cannot imagine actually saying no to him (and meaning it) With sex and play he gets to take control completely if he wants to (and I love it when he does.)

However, I rule my own life. I'm an activist on many issues, including woman's rights. I will stand up to anyone, even my sweetie, if I think they are being sexist, classist or racist. I have no tolerance for meanness and little more for ignorance.

I also know a woman that is a "slave". Her man calls the shots all of the time. They live that lifestyle 24 hours a day. She has to ask his permission to leave his presence and if he tells her to do something she stops everything to comply--BUT she is also a highly opinionated, makes her own life decisions and has an active business career. He does not interfere with who she truly is.

I think the best Subs are strong women that can handle their own lives, have their own thoughts yet are willing and able to release all of that control to someone else. What a turn on it must be for the man to know that a strong woman willingly gives herself over so completely! Dominating a passive woman leaves little challenge.

Of course, something that people tend to forget is that in the end the Sub is actually the one in charge. That's what the "safety word" is there for. If the Sub wants things to stop, she has that complete control. A true Sub isn't actually forced, she chooses to submit.

~rabbit~

New Orleans LA
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I like to reread all the ignorant shit that we post from time to time. Ms. Cougar's light bondage issues are so different from me than from a BF. We wrestle around and I'll pin her down. Shortly she wants me to lighten up so we can fuck/make love. When she is with a BF she wants him to make her feel what she is doing is very illicit . Kinda like he is taking something and she under pressure giving something that neither one of them have a right to.

Charlie

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Interesting question and it goes back to the beginnings of the Women's Movement. There were two main camps that butted heads with each other. One said women must be free of sex and being seen as sexual was demeaning (seeing it as a masculine demand imposed upon women) . The other camp said women must be free to have the sex as they wished, whenever and whoever they wished on equal footing with the perceived sexual freedom of men. The two that most exemplified this were Gloria Steinem and Betty Frenen who frequently butted heads over this.

In the latter view, women are free to be sexual as much as they want and in any ways they want. Being dominatrix or submissive are equally valid from a feminist point of view because you are free to choose as you like. So there is nothing inconsistent with submissive and feminist (just don't let Gloria Steinem know, lol).

Newark DE
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I was telling Ms.Cougar about his thread last night. and she said how much she enjoys being held down by a strong man with arms above head(I do it to her all the time) but I realized last night just exactly how much she loves it. She doesn't even want to be able to move her arms. She loves that powerless feeling when a nice cock is in her pussy. One thing though when she says let go it's best to let go lol. trust me I have wrestled with her enough

Charlie

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Feminism should be the right of a woman to be what she wants to be, right?

A woman who realizes that her sexual desires are to be submissive would be feminist if she embraced and expressed her desires confidently. Just as a woman who wants to be a housewife can be a housewife while supporting the right for another woman to be a CEO if that is what she wanted.

A better question might be: Why do some seem to think that a woman who wants to be submissive or wants to be the stereotypical "kept" woman is unable to be a feminist?

Heathrow FL
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TOPIC: Can a Submissive Woman Also Be a Feminist
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