Fat discrimination: Swingers Discussion 17431610202

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Fat discrimination: Swingers Discussion 17431610202

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TOPIC: Fat discrimination

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User Details are only visible to members.	"size/weight/race, etc. do not matter, I’ve believed them." Yet - you say they are telling you it's because you're overweight? Are you saying you email them, and they reply with "Sorry, you're overweight"? Or is it more like you email them, they reply with no thanks, and then you ask them why not, and THEN they say "Sorry, you're overweight?" I would never ask someone "why not?" when they reply no thanks. You're not likely to get a bald-faced honest reply. Why would I openly ask someone to tell me why they don't find me (or my wife) attractive? If you don't want to hear the answer, don't ask the question. We're not just looking for warm bodies to hump, dude. We have people we've been friends with for years. But if we're going to have sex with them, we need to feel a little somethin'. We know many swingers who are quite overweight, and many of them have terrific attitudes and just deal with the pool of people who are interested in them in that way. I can't say I've ever met one with as big of a chip on their shoulder and you clearly have.
Chesapeake VA			Username hidden (11787 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Sweettart & Vabeach, thank you for your input. Sweettart, you are absolutely correct. I don’t think I do get it….but, it’s becoming clearer. I guess when people put in their profile that they are looking for friends and that size/weight/race, etc. do not matter, I’ve believed them. Silly me. But, you’re right. This is about fucking…..not making friends. Not about associating with people that you want in your life for any length of time. You’re absolutely correct. I either need an attitude adjustment or I need to get out of the lifestyle….and I think we’re leaning towards the latter because I actually prefer to associate with people who have some sense of moral fiber. I know we’re all just “FUCKING” here and we’re not supposed to have any morals, according to general society, but I guess I was searching for something more. VA, you are right…you have your rights. Thank God we live in a country where we have rights. I have the right to do a lot of things that would not make me a nice person to be around. I can exercise my rights, too, and offend people. I choose not to do that. I guess the short of it is that you’re both right…I don’t get it and I don’t think I want it! If a person will mislead you about one thing, and really doesn’t care to know you as a person….they just want you as piece of ass…..then you really can’t trust that that person won’t deliberately mislead you about other things that could be potentially harmful, just to use your body for their own pleasure. I think I’ll stick to my toys. I know that they’re clean, they’re reliable, and they don’t lie. At least we gave this a shot and can speak of our experience with people about the lifestyle. And, contrary to popular belief, we have made a few friends. We’ll keep them and hope that they will hang around for more than just a quick fuck.
Sacramento CA			Username hidden (70 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	"You can look and judge for yourself, but, that’s not being open minded to me. That’s not preference. That’s someone judging me to be inferior due to my looks or size before they even get to know me….and that’s prejudice." No, that's someone deciding that they are not sexually interested based on appearances alone. Everyone is completely within their right to do that at any time and owes nobody an apology for doing so. At the other end of the spectrum, I don't know Scarlett Johansson at all, and I'd probably still want to fuck her even if she shrieked Nazi slogans at me with a voice like Fran Drescher. I don't need to know her to know I want to fuck her.
Chesapeake VA			Username hidden (11787 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	LnTnSacCa You don't get it do you. This is about getting naked and haveing sex, not getting together for a quilting bee. We have a long list of types we prefer not to play with or even socialize with. this is about our enjoyment and if we don't enjoy being around or with certain types of people that our choice and right.
New Orleans LA			Username hidden (2193 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	This topic is very interesting to me because I see it come up over and over again. It seems that for every person who claims that they have been discriminated against because of weight/size, there are five others who claim that it is an issue of preference or attraction. This got me thinking about the difference between preference and prejudice. I found a statement about this that struck me. The statement read: “A preference is your subconscious dictating who you are attracted to (i.e. you might be naturally more attracted to White people, but wouldn't rule out dating Black people if one caught your eye) whereas a prejudice is when you make a conscious decision NOT to date someone of a particular race due to hateful reasons (i.e. a superiority complex etc.)”. Interesting. In our experience, we’ve either contacted members or have had members who have contacted us that appear to be intested in talking and getting to know us better….until they see our pictures. Now, it could be that we’re hideously ugly. We’ve never been told that, however, we have been told that we’re too fat. And that’s if we get any response at all. Most don’t even bother to respond. It’s very discouraging because I would never think of putting something in my profile like “no stick figures allowed” or “baby needs back….not hip bones!” I prefer to get to know someone because I know that attraction lies mostly in the mind and I might find a person’s mind incredibly attractive while their physical person may not be as much so for me. But, what really gripes me is when someone says that they are “open minded” and then completely refuses to even talk to me because of my weight. Again…it could be because I’m hideously ugly. You can look and judge for yourself, but, that’s not being open minded to me. That’s not preference. That’s someone judging me to be inferior due to my looks or size before they even get to know me….and that’s prejudice. Some people say hateful things here and some people are incredibly rude and prejudiced. I intend to try to keep positive and hope that we will see the trend turn towards more people being as “open minded” as they claim.
Sacramento CA			Username hidden (70 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Wow thank you so much Gina :) smoulders you with a look
Chesapeake VA			Username hidden (11787 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Mrs. VA is one of the sexiest women I've ever met, at any size. Mr VA ain't too shabby either! Most of their attraction comes from their attitude, confidence and intelligent, and a smoldering look. G.
San Antonio TX			Username hidden (6056 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Welcome to the forums, helikes. If you think this site only caters to "hwp proportial" people, you've got to hang around a lot longer. You also need to realize that being on the heavier side does not preclude you from having fun with those who are not. When Mrs. VA was ~200 lb we landed a porn star and her husband.
Chesapeake VA			Username hidden (11787 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Right now, I'm 5'9" and 200 lbs. Not too long ago, I was 230 lbs. I plan on getting down to 170-180 lbs. at some point. I will never discriminate against someone based on their body type and don't care much for people who do.
Hunt Valley MD			Username hidden (3556 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	We get along with all varieties of people. Regardless of shape and size. There is beauty in everyone, you just have to be open to reading the book. The ugliest people I have ever met, have always been the most physically attractive, until they open their mouths. What it comes down to, if the larger populations, us BHMs and BBWs are not your preference, so be it, that is a prefrerence and understandable. Everyone has a preference or type. But, to be deliberately ugly, hurtful and cruel to others is just plain wrong. Only the most insecure, IMO, resort to that kiond of behavior. Wolfie
Burleson TX			Username hidden (1944 post)

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TOPIC: Fat discrimination