Busy Swingers Forum - everything you always wanted to know about swingers.
SwingLifeStyle Swingers Personal Ads. | SwingLifeStyle Swingers Clubs

Busy Swingers Forum

Everything you always wanted to know about swingers.

Create A Free Account

HELP
FORUMS General Discussions B.B.W. Fat discrimination
TOPIC: Fat discrimination
GoTo Page: Less ... 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 ... More 
Start   181 to 190 of 395   End
User Details are only visible to members.
Such a large spectrum of responses on this. Preference is preference, not necessarily discrimination. There are those that are just down right ugly about indicating their preferences, be it size, race, status, et al.

IMO, I concur about that us "Big 'ol Boys" have it a little more rough in the LS. Yes, I still consider myself a "Big 'ol Boy". There are those that remember me whenm I wasn't half the man I used to be, lol. It is about attitude and how you present yourself. Been there, done that, have the friends to prove it.

Just put your best foot forward.

Wolfie

Burleson TX
Username hidden
(3183 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
Livewire, I love your profile and your advice. I’m going to rethink our profile and try to make it more specific and positive. VA, it was not my original intention to come across as bitter or hostile, though, to some extent I AM bitter and hostile!! So, I will take your advice and try to temper my posts so that I am more neutral. Contrary to how it may appear, I do appreciate feedback. We want to have fun…just like everyone else here. Any tips that we can get that will help us to achieve that goal, will be appreciated.

Sacramento CA
Username hidden
(81 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
If being bitter and angry is not the impression you wish to make, you need to check your writing style. You come across as hostile. I'm certain that I'm not the only one who would read it that way.

As for people who write back "You're too fat" - why are you letting jerks upset you? We've received nasty and downright vicious replies too. One said "If I wanted to meet a heifer I'd go to a farm." You think you're the only one who gets nastygrams?

You take the good with the bad. If you think being thin gets you a 95% hit rate on emails, you are sorely mistaken.

As for the mistaken ID of the author of the email - sorry dudette.

Winter Garden FL
Username hidden
(20255 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
VA, really?? Well, if having a chip on my shoulder means that I have a different opinion on fat discrimination than you do, then I accept that. But, frankly, I don’t know how you would know what my attitude on life is like or whether I have a chip on my shoulder from two posts on a website! That’s kind of a quick snap judgement, but that’s what this lifestyle is about….according to you…..right? And, by the way……I’m a *dudette* not a *dude*. And, no….I don’t send emails asking “why don’t you like me??” I may be fat sensitive and have a chip on my shoulder, but, I’m not totally ignorant or in high school. People have actually answered emails or messages with a “you’re too fat”. Sweet….good for you for having a love handle…or two…or three…..depending on what and where you’re grabbing <wink>! I guess I’m a chubby chaser, too! And, I love a good redneck….but, we’re not into the bar scene. We, too, have plenty of friends and family outside the lifestyle. We know what’s important in life and that this site is not the be-all and end-all of life. I guess it’s just disappointing to find out we are not “fuck-worthy” or “friend-worthy” based on our looks.

Sacramento CA
Username hidden
(81 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
"size/weight/race, etc. do not matter, I’ve believed them."

Yet - you say they are telling you it's because you're overweight?

Are you saying you email them, and they reply with "Sorry, you're overweight"? Or is it more like you email them, they reply with no thanks, and then you ask them why not, and THEN they say "Sorry, you're overweight?"

I would never ask someone "why not?" when they reply no thanks. You're not likely to get a bald-faced honest reply. Why would I openly *ask* someone to tell me why they don't find me (or my wife) attractive? If you don't want to hear the answer, don't ask the question.

We're not just looking for warm bodies to hump, dude. We have people we've been friends with for years. But if we're going to have sex with them, we need to feel a little somethin'. We know many swingers who are quite overweight, and many of them have terrific attitudes and just deal with the pool of people who are interested in them in that way. I can't say I've ever met one with as big of a chip on their shoulder and you clearly have.

Winter Garden FL
Username hidden
(20255 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
Sweettart & Vabeach, thank you for your input. Sweettart, you are absolutely correct. I don’t think I do get it….but, it’s becoming clearer. I guess when people put in their profile that they are looking for friends and that size/weight/race, etc. do not matter, I’ve believed them. Silly me. But, you’re right. This is about fucking…..not making friends. Not about associating with people that you want in your life for any length of time. You’re absolutely correct. I either need an attitude adjustment or I need to get out of the lifestyle….and I think we’re leaning towards the latter because I actually prefer to associate with people who have some sense of moral fiber. I know we’re all just “FUCKING” here and we’re not supposed to have any morals, according to general society, but I guess I was searching for something more. VA, you are right…you have your rights. Thank God we live in a country where we have rights. I have the right to do a lot of things that would not make me a nice person to be around. I can exercise my rights, too, and offend people. I choose not to do that. I guess the short of it is that you’re both right…I don’t get it and I don’t think I want it! If a person will mislead you about one thing, and really doesn’t care to know you as a person….they just want you as piece of ass…..then you really can’t trust that that person won’t deliberately mislead you about other things that could be potentially harmful, just to use your body for their own pleasure. I think I’ll stick to my toys. I know that they’re clean, they’re reliable, and they don’t lie. At least we gave this a shot and can speak of our experience with people about the lifestyle. And, contrary to popular belief, we have made a few friends. We’ll keep them and hope that they will hang around for more than just a quick fuck.

Sacramento CA
Username hidden
(81 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
"You can look and judge for yourself, but, that’s not being open minded to me. That’s not preference. That’s someone judging me to be inferior due to my looks or size before they even get to know me….and that’s prejudice."

No, that's someone deciding that they are not sexually interested based on appearances alone. Everyone is completely within their right to do that at any time and owes nobody an apology for doing so.

At the other end of the spectrum, I don't know Scarlett Johansson at all, and I'd probably still want to fuck her even if she shrieked Nazi slogans at me with a voice like Fran Drescher. I don't need to know her to know I want to fuck her.

Winter Garden FL
Username hidden
(20255 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
This topic is very interesting to me because I see it come up over and over again. It seems that for every person who claims that they have been discriminated against because of weight/size, there are five others who claim that it is an issue of preference or attraction. This got me thinking about the difference between preference and prejudice. I found a statement about this that struck me. The statement read: “A preference is your subconscious dictating who you are attracted to (i.e. you might be naturally more attracted to White people, but wouldn't rule out dating Black people if one caught your eye) whereas a prejudice is when you make a conscious decision NOT to date someone of a particular race due to hateful reasons (i.e. a superiority complex etc.)”. Interesting. In our experience, we’ve either contacted members or have had members who have contacted us that appear to be intested in talking and getting to know us better….until they see our pictures. Now, it could be that we’re hideously ugly. We’ve never been told that, however, we have been told that we’re too fat. And that’s if we get any response at all. Most don’t even bother to respond. It’s very discouraging because I would never think of putting something in my profile like “no stick figures allowed” or “baby needs back….not hip bones!” I prefer to get to know someone because I know that attraction lies mostly in the mind and I might find a person’s mind incredibly attractive while their physical person may not be as much so for me. But, what really gripes me is when someone says that they are “open minded” and then completely refuses to even talk to me because of my weight. Again…it could be because I’m hideously ugly. You can look and judge for yourself, but, that’s not being open minded to me. That’s not preference. That’s someone judging me to be inferior due to my looks or size before they even get to know me….and that’s prejudice. Some people say hateful things here and some people are incredibly rude and prejudiced. I intend to try to keep positive and hope that we will see the trend turn towards more people being as “open minded” as they claim.

Sacramento CA
Username hidden
(81 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
Wow thank you so much Gina :)

*smoulders you with a look*

Winter Garden FL
Username hidden
(20255 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
Mrs. VA is one of the sexiest women I've ever met, at any size. Mr VA ain't too shabby either! Most of their attraction comes from their attitude, confidence and intelligent, and a smoldering look.

G.

San Antonio TX
Username hidden
(7530 posts)
GoTo Page: Less ... 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 ... More 
Start   181 to 190 of 395   End
TOPIC: Fat discrimination