regret and emotional fallout : Swingers Discussion 190239

155
regret and emotional fallout : Swingers Discussion 190239

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TOPIC: regret and emotional fallout

Created by: packagedeal4203	The original post for this thread was deleted.

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User Details are only visible to members.	If your talking to me? Yes I do understand about all the work in marrage. We have been married 24 years 4 kids 1 grandson and 1 grand daughter on the way, Its been a long hard road with both good and bad times,Mostly good, What Im saying and I also will stick to it,Is if tana gets to the point of where she dont want it much,,thats fine,BUT!!! That shit of a few drinks at another place and all of a suden ready to fuck another,JUst want work...Thats all I am saying. I do not know much about thier situation,but something just dont add up Mickey.
Rayne LA			Username hidden (3827 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I have a hard time ever understanding what you're really trying to say, Mickey, but...sure? Somewhere down the line someone got the impression love and marriage is a magic union requiring no effort. Someone was fucking wrong. It takes work, work and more work. Doesn't mean it's a sentence. Doesn't mean it's always HARD work, but effort and dedication nonetheless. And not just to being faithful, not just to living together. But to being faithful to ALL aspects of your marriage. To WORKING TOGETHER. If what I said doesn't make sense to you, I wonder why you swing at all. I stand by what I said.
Concord CA			Username hidden (2087 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I am not saying this to be an ass,But I just cant see my wife meds or not,, not wanting to fuck me but will let loose with another because its something difrent,,If that is the case I can say also that its time for me to plow a new row right? I just do not buy that. If my wife was not into fucking me,but after a few is all of the suden ready to fuck someone else,,I guess its just me, but I think we would have to end either swinging or our relationship. Again,,Just my thoughts. Mickey.
Rayne LA			Username hidden (3827 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Deerhunters, While I agree with previous sentiments that swinging is not healthy in your relationship RIGHT NOW, it SOUNDS like perhaps your wife enjoys the thrill of the "new", "unknown" and being desired by someone who has no "obligation" to be. I understand she's on medication which is warping her sex drive. I understand alcohol is acting as liquid courage at these events and allowing her to let loose. Perhaps, in addition to EXTENDED dialogue between the two of you, and complete removal from any participation in swinging until there's resolution and understanding between the two of you, you could recreate the environment for her- and only her. For you as a couple. Her sex drive is hindered by her medication, but even without medication, our desire waivers during the course of our cycles, our hormones and stress levels play a serious role in how easily we will become aroused. You're going to have to try to think out of the box, be patient and understanding and genuinely desire HER. Once you (re)connect as a couple, swinging may be plausible. But until then, it could very well solidify your separation.
Concord CA			Username hidden (2087 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	The one time I really regretting joining in with a couple was once when it became obvious that he was driving the situation and she wasn't really into it. It seemed like she was just going along in order to please him but wasn't really that interested in playing. It was obvious she wasn't enjoying the situation so that really put the damper on my enjoyment. I'm not the sort that can just get mine at someone else's expense, I guess I'm a pleaser at heart and if she isn't having fun and I can sense that, it isn't going to be any fun for me, either.
San Jose CA			Username hidden (16 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	The one time we played , this wife kept looking over and giving him the evil eye. Talk about uncomfortable! I felt so sorry for the guy. omg i think we were with that couple too lol. she kept asking if he was ok. he was ok until she kept asking, then not so good.
Philadelphia PA			Username hidden (1488 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	yea, there's deeper issues here then swinging preferences... i think this relationship could use further examination on how and why it got like this and what (and for whom) changes can be made to better it, ...if they 'both' want to.... i think this has little to do with her low sex drive and swinging sounds like a bad idea for all involved!
Kunkletown PA			Username hidden (2999 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	We have played in same room except one time,I was ok with that,But the not at home for me,but will have a few then wana fuck another but not in same room,would not work for me at all,,Just my thoughts. Mickey.
Rayne LA			Username hidden (3827 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	no no She, i did not mean the separate room is the reg flag, i meant his whole situation is a red flag. just no togetherness any where... i completely see the joys of seperate room for whatever reasons one mite choose. :)
Kunkletown PA			Username hidden (2999 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	KInd, maybe I am reading this wrong , but just because his wife does not want to be in the same room , it might just be her preference NOT a red flag . Just because you like it , doesnt mean ALL ladies do. Perhaps she tried it with him there and did not fully enjoy herself. Why have sex with another person if you can not be yourself and totally have fun? If my husband asked to have separate room play with someone because me watching made him uncomfortable , we would try it. If then we both liked it ,then fine. The one time we played , this wife kept looking over and giving him the evil eye. Talk about uncomfortable! I felt so sorry for the guy. Not saying that this man does this , but it happens. Just being watched can bring a girlie boner down.
Augusta NJ			Username hidden (16075 post)

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TOPIC: regret and emotional fallout