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question for all : Swingers Discussion 916791031
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Wayne Gretzky said: "You miss 100% of the shots not taken."

Hi all, As a newbie here, I'm glad the question was asked. It reminds me of back in the day when I would run into girls who didn't know the difference between flirting and FLIRTING.

Even here in the supposedly sexually open website I'm highly confused about how to approach anyone. I know everyone is different but it seems you have to have ESP to know who wants to go slow and who wants to just get to bed already.

I'll keep checking out the forums and taking my shots and maybe I'll learn something. :-)

Peace & Love! DJ

Morganville NJ
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SLOtowner makes a very good point.

An active single male needs to know when to take the lead. Many couples will contact you with the expectation that you are experienced, reputable, know what you are doing, and that you can guide them to the next step. They have come to you for these reasons, and you have a responsibility to deliver. What I would have done is assume that they wanted to play (it is pretty obvious that they do), and suggest that we go get a room.

Memphis TN
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You know, this seems very strange to me. NOT that the couple asked you to come over and sit and then became very suggestive, but that: 1. you were waiting for a direct invitation 2. you had to come here and ask "what should I have done?"

This is an old joke but here goes: Guy walking down the street runs into a friend of his. His friend is all beat up, bleeding from a cut above his eye, his other eye is swollen shut, his lip is swollen and slightly split and bleeding and his clothing is all mussed up.

The guy asks, "Good grief, what happened to you!?"

His friend answers, "Well I saw this good looking chick and I asked her if she wanted to fuck. She beat the hell out of me! Must have had karate training or something!"

The guy says, "What? You just asked a strange woman to fuck? Do you do that often?" His friend nods yes. "Well, you sure must get beat up a lot!!"

His friend replies, "Yeah, I do get slapped a lot, mostly, but you'd be surprised at how much pussy I get, too!!"

So, the point is, you should have taken the lead and asked them if they could get away from their friends so you three could get over to their place and have some fun together. That's what they were waiting for. For you to say, "Hey yeah, let's do it."

San Luis Obispo CA
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Having a "social" card will allow them to contact you at a later date...if the feeling is right. The first guy to do that to me...ended up having me call him 3 months later.

M

Glen Burnie MD
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One of the things we see all the time in the lifestyle is people who flirt, kissing touching, stroking, and talk about giving blow jobs when its safe and there is not way it could possibly happen. It's so hot that you know the party that night will be insane. Then when there is an opportunity like after the dance in the party rooms you can't find them anywhere. It happens all the time at swing conventions and events. You see the same kind of thing on here with people who send endless sexy E-mails but never show up in person. Women in the lifestyle have become very aggressive sexually. Most of them have no problem communicating their desires.

Land O Lakes FL
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Picking up someone in a straight crowd is extrememly difficult at best. For that reason we prefer going to swing clubs or bars. That way at least there is some common understanding that you are there for a purpose not just hanging out talking about sports. There are a lot of people outside our lifestyle who like to flirt but if you ask the question they act offended.

Like all things in the lifestyle it's up to the women, well with the possible exception of the guy who drinks beer, eats hot dogs and watches sports while getting a blow job! I think the only thing a single guy can do in this situation is wait for the woman. If she is truly interested in a threesome she will let you know. She will find a way to stroke your cock and tell you she'd love for you to join her for a little fun. If you bring up the subject you could be the bad guy, very quickly.

Land O Lakes FL
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There's a more direct way to figure this one out. Wait for the husband in question leaves the table...for a beer or what ever and follow him. Have a social card made up ahead of time with your name and e-mail address. You can put your phone number on it but I have both types. Only put your cell on it, never your home.

Tell him you are having a great time and would like to get to know them better. Express gratitude at their insistence that you join them. Tell him you have experience being the third wheel. And if that is that what they are looking for, you would be honored to help them out. If he says yes. Give him your card and set up another meeting.

I personally would be wary of going home with them. You have NO idea how experienced they are at this game. Someone could freak out and become violent. If he bites on playing that night, spring for a room. It's much safer to play at a hotel/motel than venture into another man's territory.

I would put in a "safe call" to a buddy. Tell him the names, car license plate #, and what hotel you are going to. Always leave a trail. Make sure you use condoms. It's always better to be safe. If they say you don't need protection, tell them you last longer with a condom on.. ;)

Good luck and plays safe.

Mischief (finds players every where.)

Glen Burnie MD
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Boy, ya sure can tell when these threads spin off into never never land

Pasadena CA
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so Then it's DA BOYS or the texans?

Lake Worth FL
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hey the denver donkeys let the da bears off the hook..... at least my steelers have a winning record. lol

Lake Worth FL
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