Wife chatting with the second male: Swingers Discussion 207788101

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TOPIC: Wife chatting with the second male

Created by: thrust6969 Original Starting post for this thread:
We have had a 3 some with a guy and are looking to have a long term thing with him. I [the husband] am OK with the sex ETC at our meetings but find that my wife wants to chat on line with the guy most days. I would like her to have only occasional contact as my view is you chat to friends occasionally but to someone you fancy as often as you can. How do other wives / husbands feel about contact with the other guy? My wife says that as she is having sex with him she needs to know him, and i am OK with daily contact before we played for her to get to know him but once she has sucked his cock i feel she knows him well enough LOL.

Created by: thrust6969
Original Starting post for this thread:

We have had a 3 some with a guy and are looking to have a long term thing with him. I [the husband] am OK with the sex ETC at our meetings but find that my wife wants to chat on line with the guy most days. I would like her to have only occasional contact as my view is you chat to friends occasionally but to someone you fancy as often as you can. How do other wives / husbands feel about contact with the other guy?
My wife says that as she is having sex with him she needs to know him, and i am OK with daily contact before we played for her to get to know him but once she has sucked his cock i feel she knows him well enough LOL.

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User Details are only visible to members.	Sometimes I think I'm dummer than a bag of hammers. You people on this thread and others are the best. This SLS is the is the only relationship forum I ever participate in. So leme think... If I have a question about what I should do within the relationship between Jane and I, .... Ask Jane !!! dugh.. So I asked, and found out it kind of turns her on a bit to have me managing the fellas that come into her life. Sheesh !! Never thought of that. It was a really great conversation. The learning never stops. Curt
Pasadena CA			Username hidden (175 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	We have had a similar situation but kind of the other way around. We were with a couple that the woman was bi and played with me as well. Mr Fun is well packaged more then 90% of men then I have been with and this situation was no exception. They were in a long time relationship and again like every couple we shared so far, Mr Fun was well beyond what her Mr was and she made it very clear she was enjoying the situation. Afterwards she was in constant contact with Mr Fun and only spoke with me when he suggested we are a package and not very comfortable with her singling him out. But the contact continued. No too long afterwards their relationship ended and it was clear she was "attached" to Mr Fun. We even tried the 3some thing with her, but her interest was him almost exclusively. I spoke to Mr. Fun about my thoughts on the matter and while he understood, the situation continued. I then spoke to her about it. I was nice, but told her it made me uncomfortable. She stopped for a while, but then started again. Maybe it's me, but at some point it effects your relationship. I can understand her desiring him, but it became disrespectful. Ultimately Mr Fun realized it was a bad situation. All contact has ceased because any contact would encourage her. All I will say is it made you uncomfortable enough to post about it, it has to be dealt with. If she can't/won't respect how you feel then letting him know is right for you. If that doesn't help...I'd suggest ceasing all contact. Receiving attention can be a good thing, but at your loved ones expense.
Wisconsin Dells WI			Username hidden (50 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Let Jane have her own relationship. You will find that it can be a lot of fun and open a lot of doors for you. Its all about having fun but you have to have the communication and trust in place or it may not be so much fun.
Vicksburg MS			Username hidden (466 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Ok, so I sort of find myself in a similar position. I am the computer nerd and so i tend to manage all the contact info. However recently she found a fellow t a house party she seemed to enjoy very much. Of course I didn't let him get away without exchanging contact info. He and I have written 2-3 times. Janie hasn't asked for his email address but all of a sudden I feel like I am managing her relationships and that doesn't feel quite right. She does look to me to front for us within the lifestyle but all of a sudden it's not couple to couple, it's Janie and her fella...... your 2 cents please Curt
Pasadena CA			Username hidden (175 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I was with one gentleman in the lifestyle as friends with benefits, we met another couple, daily turned to frequently daily chats with the other gentleman, then to meeting alone for lunch and then I was with the one I had been chatting with for 11 years. Still saw the friend I began with but we didnt further our journey in the lifestyle, just remainded good freinds after that. Not saying that it will happen but that is how I started with one and ended up with another.
Spring TX			Username hidden (1844 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	If trust is becoming an issue you might want to take a step back. This lifestyle is fun and all but the primary relationship is the most important so protect it carefully! Good luck! :)
Bowling Green KY			Username hidden (12 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	My standard reply is, whatever ALL of those involved are comfortable with. Don't worry about what others think or do, simply communicate with your SO and the "second male" and establish whatever boundaries YOU are comfortable with.
Youngstown OH			Username hidden (11414 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	"Understand getting comfortable. I would be concearned on the everyday chats for building emotional intimacy. You should feel #1. Is this experience to enhance your relationship and sexual play? " my husband knows that he is always first in my life. He enjoys the fact that I have a few single males I text or email with pretty much daily. PG
Louisville KY			Username hidden (13987 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Welcome to the forum TandemExplorers
Youngstown OH			Username hidden (11414 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	If you treat her like she is #1 then there isn't a problem.
Vicksburg MS			Username hidden (466 post)

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TOPIC: Wife chatting with the second male

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