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Who pays for what : Swingers Discussion 3776610771
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TOPIC: Who pays for what
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Meet/play:

“I hope you're not implying that just because the guy pays for the room or we don't play that it's prostitution. That's a strong accusation, better be careful how you word things.”

“I will be damned if I'll pay a penny so some guy can do my wife. Free p***y? I don't think so. If they want a free lay...better find a girlfriend.”

You Sir, should be careful how YOU word things. The word MERCENARY comes to mind. I didn’t accuse you of anything. I stated my opinion regarding YOUR practice of REQUIRING PAYMENT to fuck your wife. That’s what no free pussy means, Right? To exchange “consideration* for sex” sounds like something other than swinging to me.

*Consideration is a money equivalent. (i.e.: food, rooms, drinks.)

I’m no implying anything. I’m stating flat out that your requirement of consideration for sex is at best mercenary.

I’m here for fun. If I’m in a situation where more money will help a couple I’m interested in: get a baby sitter, pay for gas, provide a room. I’ll do it. Couples are a dime a dozen. Shallow, mercenary-type folks are not worth the time of day. Quality folks are worth my nickle. You are not invested until you put your money on the table.

I totally agree with 4Play. If my partner wanted someone, I would make sure it happened. That IS why I work, to take care of my partners.

Free Mischief for the select few. wink.

Glen Burnie MD
 
 
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Just curious... Why is this really an issue? I see nothing wrong with taking our friends out and buying them dinner. Everyone has a limit or a boundary but why miss out on a good friendship just because they are a bit low on funds. On the other hand I won't be used nor would we allow someone that is "a Leach" into our relationship!

Our society runs on money so I will never say it is not an issue but I will say that people, even single people should be treated respectfully and with the dignity they deserve! (key word is deserve!) If a single male or female wants to be part of our moment(s) then we asses their value to us. If Mrs. 4play wants him bad enough I may spring for the whole night! Why do you work anyway? We do so that we may afford to enjoy life and... well, we do enjoy life without worrying about a mere $50.00 dinner!

Brownwood TX
 
 
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You are not invested in what you do not pay for.

As a single guy, I would pay for the room if you paid for dinner. I'm not paying to have sex. If you are not attracted enough to put some money on the transaction, I'm not attracted enough. It is selling sex to expect the single male to pay for it all.

If I'm generous and do pay. It would be more than nice to have the couple return the favor.

I could very easily not pay for anything. I'm not like that. Why? Because I'm not selling sex. I'm pick folks that are interesting on many levels. If I'm not attracted enough to travel, pay my way, or participate financially. Why bother?

I don't need to spend money to get laid. I wouldn't as a male either. My self worth dictates not allowing myself to be used.

Any woman who thinks her pussy is golden (that different from others), is sadly mistaken. They are a dine a dozen. What makes some more special? The person attached.

I avoid anyone who thinks what they have between their legs is different, special, or somehow different.

Mischief<---avoids all offers that indicate payment for my participation.

Glen Burnie MD
 
 
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Agree with DBStPete - going Dutch is the best way. Also we much prefer to meet for drinks rather than dinner...just much more relaxing and informal that way.

We can usually host ing our house and don't have to worry about the hotel issue. And for our single and couple friends that we already know, just come on over....

Best thing to do is to agree up front when first meeting someone though. For new poeple who have to travel to meet with us, we will usually pay for dinner/drinks.

Albany GA
 
 
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First post. Hi, everybody! :)

For dinner or drinks we go dutch, or heck, I'll fight for the check often as not. But the guy provides the party arrangements.

We won't travel far, and we don't entertain. It's not so much the money as the hassle. I don't want to have to deal with it. If a guy has a house or apartment close, all the better, and he gets an advantage. :)

If we got into a regular thing with a guy then we'd be happy to swap expenses, but other than that, the guy has to provide the room, for us. Other folks differ. To be fair, we try to be very clear about this in our profile.

Saint Petersburg FL
 
 
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Hmm...well...bear with me, as this is my first forum posting here.

For me, I never expect anyone to pay for me...I take a kind of humble approach to the whole situation. I don't think anyone owes me anything...heck...I am already happy to find people who are serious enough to meet in person, whether the fun goes any further or not.

If I initiate the contact, I do feel a little obligation to pick up dinner, or a couple of drinks or coffees or whatver the circumstances call for. (The further they have to drive, the more I feel like I should pick up the tab.) It's not a big deal if people want to go dutch though...I can really understand why they might prefer that.

As for treating me...I certainly do appriciate it, but it's really not expected.

Austin TX
 
 
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Hmmmmmmmm guess we are a litle different on things then some of you, if we are Meeting a Single either it be Male or Female we pay for dinner and if we go else where to a club or something then we pay there also to but its for the first meeting only. If we are meeting a Couple then yes we usually go Dutch theres been quite a few times when weve met with couples they have came here to our home and weve threw something on the grill and just chatted so no dutch there since we went got things to cook....LOL. When we do meet others just a lil something we do is they always get a hug and a flower just to make things feel more comfortable and it breaks the ice pretty easy. Not had to buy many flowers though since nobody wants us........LOL i know EXPO will make a remark to that one.....***winks*** Well thats just our input here if it matters ...........ok ok gone for now enjoy everybody and always wear a smile :} Later Taterzzzzzzzzzzzzzz CJ & Markie

Castlewood VA
 
 
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I treat everyone the same. I always pickup part of the tab. I don't pick up the drinks, because I don't drink. After the first couple of dates.. I like to alternate. I pay one time, they pay the next.

If I want to up to ante' on the room/venue etc. I pick up the difference. It's my way of showing appreciation and equal participation in the gig.

If I invite folks to my home..It's on me. Exception: the alcohol. I don't drink. I don't like handling it. It's BYOB.

I prefer this. I retain some power in the situation.

Mischief.

Glen Burnie MD
 
 
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On Contrare Monfrere(sp?)....since my hubby would rather just do strictly couples, we'd end up never 'doing' single men. Likewise, if we're paying for 'dutch', it'll be for couple play only. Now, we tend to see single men it's when it's cuz I haven't found a couple we want to play with, so since men are a dime a dozen, as far as lookin, if they don't want to pay to play, then should we pay?? or should I keep my big fat outh shut and play with my hubby? No problems there on my part. I hate having to travel into Houston.

Simonton TX
 
 
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couldn't have said it any better expo! Well said!

Brownwood TX
 
 
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TOPIC: Who pays for what