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When to avoid Newbies : Swingers Discussion 185767
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TOPIC: When to avoid Newbies
Created by: Sparkles23
Original Starting post for this thread:
We apologize for posting this question - we read but never thought we would post, but are there other couples like us who seem to get plenty of attention or inquiries from the newbies? I guess they feel comfortable with us. We are close to two years in the LS, but took a break for a while - so we are still looking to explore so much - just not sure that newbies really take us there. Can't say we have tolerance for them. Are we wrong? What is our responsibility, especially as a lifetime member? We are a Full Swap couple and the female half of us has a straight attitude about the LS. You look at the other couple, you talk a little bit, you agree you like, discuss your safe boundaries, and enough is enough - Let's do this! We were new too, but went into a club - had no words - stripped down - did our thing, and the chatter was not important. Should we have a different attitude?

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I do have my friends, and I have my preferences, I prefer not to be the one teaching the newbies, to skip the drama they can (and alot do) bring, its a preference.

Spring TX
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TG&MM,

My only advice is do what you enjoy and let others decide what works for them. Some choose not to play with newbies, some only want BBC, others only play same room and the list goes on and on. You may not agree but that is the beauty of this LS, there is ALWAYS someone who will want what you do. No sense trying to convince someone else that their choices are wrong or to convert them to your way of thinking. I happen to enjoy newbies but Passion chooses not to. Instead of trying to change her mind, invite me!

;-D

Youngstown OH
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Hmmm...let me clarify:

Why would you 'pre-discriminate' on such an ethereal and random a rule as 'being new'? Why not use your exquisitely honed instincts to separate the wheat from the chaff? It seems to be so much more efficient that way, no?

Pwace

East Fishkill NY
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Passionseekers:

So does 'newbie' mean 'drooling puppy' is an equivalent? Is every newbie a drooling puppy? Or every drooling puppy is by definition a newbie? Don't you think that's rather provincial? From someone who is 'newbie again' because my wonderful lover is a wide eyed newbie (though I'm as grizzled a vet as you might find) I can tell you there is nothing more than a casual causality between the two. I have known many a 'veteran' with 'performance issues' and been floored by the wanton raw sexual 'performance' energy displayed by innocents still wet behind the ears. In fact there was this one girl....but I digress. Feel free to compartmentalize all the swingers you come into contact with. If it comforts you, all the better. I for one will forestall the pre-judging by situation/status/race/age/nose hair or length of forefinger. OK, the nose hair I am told IS a deal breaker ;) Point is, though we most assuredly DO discriminate in this lifestyle-why would you PRE-discriminate? Unless you have a true plethora of eminently qualified perspective playmates to peruse. In which case-never mind.....

Peace

East Fishkill NY
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Thanks 2DE. I appreciate that!

Youngstown OH
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"The good thing about newbies is, they don't know any better."

Ha ha ha! As always, NicAtNight, I love your commentary! :-)

Mrs.DE

Federal Way WA
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"you might get more vigor and excitement out of a newbie couple than someone who's been around the block a few times. Something to think about... "

You *might* get herpes. I mean, *might*...duh! :-) Why is THAT something to think about? I don't want some drooling puppy. I want a man ( or woman) who can subdue their excitement and eagerness and turn it into technique.

Concord CA
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SunnyFun, Welcome to the forums. Your post makes for a lot of sense.

Freeland MI
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Personally being new to the lifestyle, i dont see any reason why people wouldn't want a fresh couple. I know we are personally dedicated and with everyone we have met so far wants us coming back so, whats the difference, if you know how to have fun wether your new or not, its still fun! Full of unfulfilled fantasys and desires with lots to of imagination, you might get more vigor and excitement out of a newbie couple than someone who's been around the block a few times. Something to think about...

Palmetto Bay FL
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I will say I do tend to avoid newbie single males. I tend to like aggressive men which in general you won't get with a newbie single male. Although since I'm having trouble finding ones IN the lifestyle I might have to break with that and see what I can round up at a bar lol.

Newbie couples we don't mind, but hard to find couples were we all click newbie or not.

Louisville KY
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TOPIC: When to avoid Newbies