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Single men, WTF : Swingers Discussion 1780161041
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Sed-well you may be correct about being on top not necessarily being dominant but in my mind, it's sort of like a general characteristic of being dominant, not a definitive criteria by any means. I feel that personally I can control the action much better being on top (so in my mind I kind of lump it in as a "junior" characteristic TYPICALLY-not definitively-associated with the dominant one) but your point has always been well-taken with me.

Saint Clair Shores MI
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Dominant is a personality, as well as submissive. Being on top during sex is not a dominant make, nor a submissive if you're on the bottom. That is just ridiculous to even think on those lines. Scandle, what you describe is having sex, not dominating or submitting.

Dominating requires bending of the will, making another person do what you want them to do, furthermore, if they want to do it, they're not submitting, there is no submission if there is no bending of will :). It can be applied to anything sex included.

Rumson NJ
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*When I put on an apron and do the chores am I being submissive? *

Not sure, more like cross dressish :)

Rumson NJ
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Sed, isn't dominant or submissive more about mindset and who is in control of the playtime, than sexual positions? That's what I've come to understand from what I've read. What Mr. Scandle and I do, with me on top, is an equal sharing. It could be changed to sub/dom if I ordered him to lay back while I climbed on top OR if he ordered me to climb on top. Right?

Sheboygan Falls WI
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When I put on an apron and do the chores am I being submissive?

White Hse Sta NJ
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Finally, someone brought up a great point. Being on top while fucking is not a dominant make, just like being on the bottom is no submissive make. I just don't understand such ignorance. Furthermore, a personal pet peeve, improper usage of terminology, domme, or dominate to describe what people do. How much more illiterate/ignorant can people get. I see it in the BDSM fora consistently.

Rumson NJ
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Spanky seems to think so. I disagree.

Sheboygan Falls WI
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I don't see myself as a domme but prefer being on top because of my physical response. Other positions are fine, but 9 times out of 10 I end up in the cowgirl position, freely bouncing away while looking into my husband's eyes, and loving every minute of it!

Sheboygan Falls WI
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Thanks, kinddrag.

Lost--yeah, I know what you mean. I know friends who have absolutely no ability to reverse roles-they just are completely unable to switch mindset and are totally lost trying to. Sounds like you have this issue.

I am versatile enough though to switch things around and still enjoy with good success but even so there is nothing like being in your element/zone with someone who totally compliments you sexually.

I imagine there are many individuals that equally enjoy being dominant and submissive. Lucky them!

Saint Clair Shores MI
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spanky, I agree with you in regard to the sub/dom and natural state. I have tried to be domme. It is so far from my natural state, usually when I DO try to be domme I end up laughing my ass off because I look ridiculous. Its hilarious. In the office I am type A in control alpha female. In the bedroom I feel like a complete idiot trying to give commands. Hmm. When you have 2 people who are in their natural state though.....thats some really, really good fucking.


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