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SMs, How would you like to be treated : Swingers Discussion 2216501031
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TOPIC: SMs, How would you like to be treated
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If I was unfaithful I would be all up in here with ice cream tales from far far away. But then again I ain't unfaithful :)

Buford GA
 
 
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I don't know, I bet UNFAITHFUL has some pretty interesting stories on why he chose that name lol. Stories are like Ice Cream, not everyone likes the same flavor.

Mrs Sav

Anniston AL
 
 
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:) sophie you do know that you just repackaged what your previous post stated.

It's all good, that is your style of verbalizing. I find you very interesting at times :), your questioning nature is cute. Like a Virgin, kissed for the very first time like a virgin...lol

In my short version I'm using this SM as a wingman for attentionwhoring purposes. I don't give it much thought after that. In the *moment I came up with some words that read interesting to me. So I hit send to share them.

Buford GA
 
 
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FF,

I love to hear stories of how a person comes up with their profile names. Our profile name has a cute story attached to it (actually an erotica story). But that is something very different you see, telling the story of how one came up with unique name for their profile when someone asks.

However, what I was referring to is the long explanation unfaithful had to give to explain to Kinddraggon what his name meant and how it didn't mean what it appears to mean to the vast majority of people who see unfaithful as a negative thing in a swinging world, where in the ideal, swingers are not cheaters and do not understand why someone would be cheating in a swinging website when swinging originally began as a husband and wife choosing together to have sex with others. (DEEP BREATH)

While I spoke in generalities, I must confess that is my point of view. I am not speaking for the whole of swingers in this matter, I am speaking of my own perspective.

My point is simply, if you have to explain and/or justify your profile name to keep others from writing you off right away, you may want to pick out a different name that is more appealing to more folks. Whether your goal is sex with couples, sex with single females, or sex with single males, UNFAITHFUL tends to be a negative in the eyes of many.

Just saying,

Sophia :)

Hendersonville NC
 
 
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our first handle/screen name was wetnwild2004 guess who won the what should our handle/screen name be debate/conversation in year one....lol

tame a little risqué but not over the top :)

I called mundane, came up with fingerfuxs for the in your face nature of the word around 2006.I have considered changing it at times. It does often get a eyebrow judgment look from a couple when making small talk at a gathering or something. Other times I get a nice dirty gurl smile, and the " that's different " comment.

I have noticed that in conversation after I say the name "fingerfuxs" spelled fuxs, then give my patented southern gentlemen's grin. It's swallowed or *digested better for lack of a better word.

Disclaimer *words bitches love words *grin*

Buford GA
 
 
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Maybe "UNFAITHFUL" is simply a disclaimer and avoids confusion, heartache , aspirations of a long term monogamous relationship . I mean there would never need to be a conversation referring to him as a lying,cheating manwhore. He can immediately point to his name and say "I warned you!" lol Frankly I'd much rather he have the name UNFAITHFUL then some of the others I've seen proclaiming the size of their cock and ego.

I've seen so many offensive names or names I simply couldn't use in "polite" society that this name didn't set off any alarm bells. On the flip side if in fact I opened the profile to learn he really was a cheating slug of a husband I also wouldn't be surprised and I would feel somewhat better that at least he was honest lol. We got an email not too long ago from NICEGUY something or other and it was quiet obvious he was a cheater. We get emails from LONGDONG with pictures that clearly prove otherwise. Screen names are simply that , something you feel suited you or in a panic word the first thing that came to mind .

Shrug Disclaimer above screen names have been altered to protect the guilty.

Mrs Sav

Anniston AL
 
 
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*smile* sidenote SM's make great wingmen

FF the extreme attentionwhore :)

Buford GA
 
 
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Just for fun:)

** C&P**If you have to explain the purpose behind your name to get anyone to take you seriously, then it is not a good name to use.

You lost me there : )

Fingerfuxxxs

Like mined people seeking like minded people could be a retort to your statement, no?

On a sex site, even more so, then a facebook page or any other social media that a profile or handle name is used. It seems to "me" it's just a word.

To the moral's swinging is being "unfaithful" be it with SM's or couples.

To a large group of nudist and the gay and lesbian community's swingers are unmoral and unfaithful.

Taking offence at words is ok in my book. Being judgmental of words is ok in my book. When language becomes preachy or this makes better sense to "us" maybe you should try it this way. Then it goes into the sermon files.

** Disclaimer, I am in no way trying to be mean or speaking with malice :) It's a interesting highjack of a thread and I'm all in !!

Buford GA
 
 
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Trying to keep this related to both the original and the latest side conversation and be nice about it, I have an observation/comment.

For a large number of SMs, getting anywhere with the couple is difficult. There are a few exceptions to that rule and I could mention a bunch of names of SMs that I find interesting, attractive, intelligent, and with some pretty nice pictures, but alas, I won't. I could say that their profile names matter a lot to me, but frankly they don't.

The easier they are to mention in public the better they are. Ones that you can shorten to one word that appears vanilla means you can discuss them in my case with my spouse in a restaurant. Something like "extreme sent a new email today". No one will understand that sentence completely, so the conversation is 'safe'.

We can talk about it without details in a public place and not let on that we are talking about having sex with a single male or another couple. That works out well unless we already know their first names. However, if I am talking about a new communication, hubby will want to know the profile name to look them up. So, we talk about profile names until a later time as we have met with the folks or built up enough familiarity that first names will work. However, even in that case, there may be a few people with the same first names like Scott or Tim, or heavens forbid, hubby's name. Then it is back to profile names. Which we always shorten.

However, "Unfaithful" is a problem. Not only in the public conversation under codes portion I mentioned but the problem my husband has with single men to begin with. He thinks most single men are married men who are wanting to cheat. He has that in his mind with nearly everyone that emails us. So, your email comes into our mailbox and hubby sees your profile name, you are ruled out immediately. You played into his worse fears, "UNFAITHFUL" = CHEATER.

Is that fair? No, not really. He is judging a book by its title alone. It is his right to judge a book by the title, if it doesn't interest him then he will not even investigate it any further. Just like in a book store. I can't do anything about changing my husband's mind and would not want to. We have one rule, 'we both have to agree'. We will never agree on this. He won't budge on something that starts off with 'unfaithful'. He won't budge at all. I don't blame him and I would never try to convince him of it otherwise.

I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. If I am told something by a person, I will take them on their word............Until I find out that they have lied to me. I am not naive and believe everything everyone says to me. I rely on the gut feeling to tell me when someone is full of shit. Then I do whatever is needed to resolve or end the 'relationship'

While you understand your profile name and you 'own' that name and that is wonderful, if you have this many people right off the bat telling you that it is sending the wrong message, there is merit to that statement. If you are confusing people or alienating those you seek to 'find and play' with, then you are putting yourself at more of an unfair advantage. Being single has to be the largest disadvantage you have on this site. Seriously, look at the profiles that state NO SINGLE MEN or block single men.

If you have to explain the purpose behind your name to get anyone to take you seriously, then it is not a good name to use. Even if you wanted to keep the base name of 'unfaithful' and added NOT after it (UNFAITHFUL-NOT) it would say something far better to the masses than what you have now.

It is of course your choice and ultimately could be your burden to bear. But please know that the suggestions/comments/critique of your name is valid whether the approach was something you appreciated.

I hope you accept this in the manner it was offered, not an attack but an honest opinion. Best of luck to you,

Sophia :)

Hendersonville NC
 
 
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It's just me, my wife is pretty much on team literal for life ..lol

I haven't even looked at your profile, single males are off our radar as a personal preference. I'm wondering if you've thought of mixing it up a little using your tagline. Ie the marquee section of ones profile.

Unfaithful

Rotten to the core enquire within Lawrdy Lawrdy forgive me I'm bout to sin Catholic girls welcome

Buford GA
 
 
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TOPIC: SMs, How would you like to be treated