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TOPIC: Open_Relationship
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As usual, Mrs. Sav articulated my point far more eloquently than I.

New Orleans LA
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"My bad, she is in control of when and where those two play and how...He is scared of me specially because he is bi-phobic BIG time! I dont really know why either just assuming which always is a bad thing. He is a small guy, very straight lace, extra vanilla type guy too and I'm as far from that as I can be. large framed Bi, tattooed biker..."

No offense intended at all but I call BS to his "fears" and I also call BS to any wife who will play the "if you trust me card" under those circumstances . You have every right to meet the partners she plays with if that is what makes you comfortable. ANY hedging on her part is a warning sign and completely disrespectful to your relationship. One partner does not get to make the rules or decide how things are played out. I personally find it appalling that your wife, knowing full well you have concerns seems more self focused and single male focused than she is on your uncomfortableness and anxiety. It sounds to me this all about her having the ability to what she she likes when , with who and how she wants to. Frankly that ti me is a clear warning sign of trouble.

Mrs Sav

Anniston AL
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sounds to me like OFP is a cuckold. Some people enjoy that sort of play, some don't. Certainly doesn't sound like you do, if it's got you tied up in knots of anxiety.

Kalona IA
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My bad, she is in control of when and where those two play and how...He is scared of me specially because he is bi-phobic BIG time! I dont really know why either just assuming which always is a bad thing. He is a small guy, very straight lace, extra vanilla type guy too and I'm as far from that as I can be. large framed Bi, tattooed biker...

Andrews NC
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NAN, I dont make the rules, we do together. She truly trusts him, so I have to trust her with that too. I would like to meet them first but cant always do that with our life as it is right now either, so I go with it the best I can, which sometimes leads to that anxiety. I'm leaning towards just not knowing until afterwards that times she is playing alone which would stop that anxiety. Just feeling this all out as we go here. Thanks for the input...truly!

Andrews NC
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IMHO if you want to meet the guy and "look him in the eye" then you should insist on it. Why do you allow the other guy to dictate the rules for you and YOUR wife?

New Orleans LA
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After many months now we have found that I the male gets stressed out when I know she is playing alone from the anxiety of not truly knowing if she is safe or not. Not jealousy, just not feeling the honest trust of the others she is with I guess. One of her playmates doesn't even want to meet me. She has known him for over 20 yrs not sexually until the last couple months but trusts him fully. I cant say the same if I cant look him in the eyes! We are still trying though... I do want her to have that fun and be able to fully enjoy herself too. As for finding a female for us it's like finding a diamond in the ocean...but again we still forge ahead and wait to see if she ever shows up in our lives and I know it will be really good when we do too.

Andrews NC
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We to have a true open marriage and she has a couple of guys she sees off and on. But like many of the couple on here finding a female friend for him seems almost impossible. I wouldn't want her to stop because of that though. I really enjoy knowing that she is having fun. Like others have posted on here its not for everyone and the trust and communications have to be there for it to work.

Vicksburg MS
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openmarriage6969, Understand and know that well now too. She does have her boyfriends away from the home but it's just us and her mom anyways. I'm still hanging in there and waiting....someday , somehow..I know the right gal will cum along...Until then I want my wife to enjoy all she desires too. Yes true love, trust, honesty and respect and very good open communication for and with each other is the only way to have this type of marriage!

Andrews NC
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We have an open relationship...this has made it very easy for me to find men but as stated before it is difficult to find women for my husband. We found this works for us. It is a relationship that requires the utmost of trust and respect for your spouse. We do not have anyone (male or female) to our house out of respect for our family. We do each spend nights away with others.

Chicago IL
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TOPIC: Open Relationship
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