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Is it cynical of me : Swingers Discussion 197397
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TOPIC: Is it cynical of me
Created by: FreeLadyInDC
Original Starting post for this thread:
I've been in the lifestyle as a single woman for a few months now, but prior to that I had been active in the lifestyle for many years with my now ex. Recently, I've been noticing the vast majority of the emails I have been receiving from couples are written from the woman's point of view. When I was part of a couple, I recall the messages coming primarily from the male half. Is it cynical of me to think that many of these "messages from the missus" are really coming from a guy trying to pull a bait and switch? I'm not sure if it's a recent trend or if it's just that I'm a single female now. Sometimes there are giveaways like they are a free member, have no certs and no pics, or they will write things that would be very odd for a woman say. Recently, a "wife" told me in her initial message that she wanted to watch her husband "f*ck [my] brains out with his huge black cock". I know there are many women out there who are sincerely interested in other women and I ended up meeting a few already. It seems like a good idea for a couple looking for a MFF to have the female write the first message to help initiate some kind of bond. It may be me being more sensitive now that I'm on my own or because of some of the stories I've heard over the years about the tricks single guys pull, but have any of you noticed an increase in the number of female halves making the first contact?

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AprilTom and Sweettart, what you are saying is exactly what I was concerned about. I've heard stories and have had my own suspicions. I'm just concerned a lot of the guys are getting sneaky by impersonating women to trick single females into meeting them.... so unfortunate....

Washington DC
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We use a cam when ever possible. Then we know who is at the other end.

Murrayville GA
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Your original post and many of the comments you’ve received are very interesting because I have been wondering about the same thing, albeit from a single male point of view. Most of my communications are with couples. But whenever I’m communicating by email and later with a chat, I always wonder exactly who is it that I am really communicating with. Is it really the wife, the husband, or some guy just goofing off by jerking my chain. I get especially cautious when the person is consistently saying what a male wants to hear. It’s curious that others have experienced similar situations.

Chester NJ
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I'm the one who does the communicating in here (the female). I think more and more women are empowered. - h

Las Vegas NV
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We have been contacted by a few couples with a "lead" female or a couple who takes turns at communicating. I really appreciate the chance to "talk" with both as we proceed.

Cincinnati OH
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No opinion on the topic but it is soo refreshing to see women who involved in the selection, search and communication. In our experience those are the most grounded, sane and happiest potential playmates....kudos ladies !

Mrs Sav

Anniston AL
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The wife half of this couple is the "voice" behind the computer 97% of the time and nearly always makes first contact. I have more time and am easier to get in touch with than my husband.

Cincinnati OH
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Hi, I'm the female half and I do virtually ALL the correspondence. The idea is that I know what he will find attractive and he wants me to be attracted to her as well so ultimately it's always my choice. I also can "play" alone with other females if I choose to. Some men leave correspondence to the wives as a comfort thing as well as to alleviate possible jealousy (maybe). We are ALWAYS looking lol. Waiting for the day we find our "ONGOING 3RD"

Cordova TN
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I think it could be legitimate. I used to be on here as a single female and got TONS of mail from couples, be it the male half or the female half writing. I think a lot of women want to be the one to FIND the 2nd girl to join them for their man.

Concord CA
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I've been in the lifestyle as a single woman for a few months now, but prior to that I had been active in the lifestyle for many years with my now ex. Recently, I've been noticing the vast majority of the emails I have been receiving from couples are written from the woman's point of view. When I was part of a couple, I recall the messages coming primarily from the male half. Is it cynical of me to think that many of these "messages from the missus" are really coming from a guy trying to pull a bait and switch? I'm not sure if it's a recent trend or if it's just that I'm a single female now. Sometimes there are giveaways like they are a free member, have no certs and no pics, or they will write things that would be very odd for a woman say. Recently, a "wife" told me in her initial message that she wanted to watch her husband "f*ck [my] brains out with his huge black cock". I know there are many women out there who are sincerely interested in other women and I ended up meeting a few already. It seems like a good idea for a couple looking for a MFF to have the female write the first message to help initiate some kind of bond. It may be me being more sensitive now that I'm on my own or because of some of the stories I've heard over the years about the tricks single guys pull, but have any of you noticed an increase in the number of female halves making the first contact?

Washington DC
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TOPIC: Is it cynical of me