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Does Single 21 year old males have any luck on SLS : Swingers Discussion 2180091013
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FORUMSGeneral Discussions3-SomeDoes Single 21 year old males have any luck on SLS
TOPIC: Does Single 21 year old males have any luck on SLS
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We would be fine with it, as long as 1) You dont talk like most 21 yo blue dots and are respectful and mature 2) Refer to #1

Appleton WI
 
 
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-but that doesn't stop people from judging us on it.

Not everyone who turns you down because of your age is necessarily judging you.

Some women find mature men more attractive (that distinguished touch of gray). Some men find mature women more attractive (frequently softer curves and a fuller figure).

Couples may choose to socialize with others closer to their age because they have more in common outside of the bedroom.

Others may just be weirded out at the thought of having sex with someone near the age of their children or the "neighborhood kids."

And I've spoken to women who have no interest in "teaching the ropes" to a 20 year old. They want experience.

Just my $0.02.

Columbia MD
 
 
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Go back and re-read your profile.

Count how many times you use "I", "I'm", "me", "my" and so on.

I counted 24 of them in 16 sentences. And 10 of those sentences started with some form of I or me. That's a truly impressive percentage.

A lot of people reading your profile could easily decide that it's all about you. Your one concession to talking about what you bring to the party is "orgasms".

When you're competing against thousands of other single guys, that's not much.

Columbia MD
 
 
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"After they told us their ages we had to ask them what it said on sls cause we didn't read it..."

Hmm. Do you read the age range that people are looking for? Normally that means: If you are outside our range, please don't contact us.

When we get an email, we look for indications -- anything -- that shows they've read our profile. A "form" email that doesn't refer to any specific compatibility is not worth replying to.

Flat Rock NC
 
 
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We have had a lot of trouble meeting people because of our age. We have been cursed at, blocked, told off, and harassed just for showing interest. We have also had a great connection with a couple, and even played with a few. But when they saw our age on here, they thought it over, and when we contacted them again, they said we were too young, or just blocked us. We are always up front about our age, but that doesn't stop people from judging us on it. However, this isn't our loss. We meet lots of people. We choose who we play with and who we don't. A lot of people have turned us down but it is part of the process. The trick is to keep trying. We send lots of messages (this is not a bad thing to us). We were waiting to pay for membership here to make sure we liked this website. We joined last week because after checking our sent messages we had sent 186 messages as free members in 6 months. We have met a couple that hardly ever gets to play because he is 51 and she is 27. They were having so much trouble they started lying on their profile about their ages. (After they told us their ages we had to ask them what it said on sls cause we didn't read it.) So, don't worry and keep trying. There is nothing wrong with being inexperienced. Everyone here was at one time. When we started on here, we had only been with each other so we had started on here inexperienced as well. The thing to remember is that a lot of people our age act petty, jealous, annoying, and bitchy. Half of the people turning you down is just tired of dealing with them, and the other half is them.

Herrin IL
 
 
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One thing you can really do to help at least with some couples .... Check your spelling and your grammar. At least you didn't use text speak.

Also take the time to read each profile you write to and write a personalized letter. A mass mailing reads like what it is... a form letter... would you want a form letter to ask you out on a date?

Hope this helps...

Emlenton PA
 
 
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"I send mass amounts of messages but still get nothing back. "

This sentence right here might sum up your troubles. Men who send Mass emails or mass amounts of emails generally send some type of "form" letter. "Hi you re sexy,want to meet" types of emails. If you're sending mass emails my bet would be you are not carefully reading their profiles and making sure you fit the bill. Specifically if you keep hearing "not looking for single males" . Generally most profiles either state that right up front or on their interest bar they have zero interest. pay attention to details, read each profile thoroughly and tailor your email to each couple or single female. YES!!! It is a lot of work and time but swinging isn't for the lazy, those lacking in attention to detail or those with thin skin. Being rejected is part of every ones reality, it happens to us ALL. Brush it off and move on. You also mention you are here to please the ladies....well I'm afraid that's not much of a stand out comment, every man here would say the same. What you are also missing in your profile is some statement of how you see yourself fitting in with a couple, what you're role is . Keep in mind that majority of women you will interact with will be part of a couple and as such you will have to pass inspection of both of them and not many are going to meet you without their partners. That being said you need to visualize yourself as a 3rd and be mindful of that role. You also need to be able to express that position to any potential people you meet. Many times single men have this misguided illusion that they are filling some void that the husband/partner does not.....nothing could be further from the trust. A great motivator for many women is that their husbands like to watch AND join in so both males can please her. You need to be comfortable with close incidental/accidental male contact and welcome the opportunity to be a 3rd. Some sessions will be one on one but they are not the norm , most husbands will participate . I do feel your age is a big part of the issue but you can't fix that, the best you can do is present yourself as a responsible, wise adult. Explain how you see your role so that it is very clear you understand and they understand . Right now it reads as if you hope to or expect to be dealing strictly with the female half.

Mrs Sav

Anniston AL
 
 
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bilady, you can't post in the forums unless you have a paid membership.

Louisville KY
 
 
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college, your profile seems pretty decent. You might add that you really appreciate older women, since most of those you're writing are probably older by quite a bit. Just saying age is not an issue, you may come across as being merely tolerant of those much older than yourself.

An older woman, even a very fit one, may be self conscious around younger people. Let them know they are exactly the one you want to meet.

Flat Rock NC
 
 
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Whoops, sure wish I would have looked at your profile, I'm glad you're a paid member and you do have a picture. I guess you just live in a bad neighborhood for swingers.

Presque Isle WI
 
 
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TOPIC: Does Single 21 year old males have any luck on SLS