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Couples - How do you first meet single guys and why : Swingers Discussion 387441011
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TOPIC: Couples - How do you first meet single guys and why
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We usually chat with the guy online and get to know them. If all is cool and I'm attracted to him, we invite him over for some fun. At home, hubby and I usually chat with him, have a few drinks and if they guy is open to it, engage in a little herbal recreation.

So far this has worked out without any problems and I usually end up very happy at the end of the night.

Washingtonville NY
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For me, it has never been an issue about a first meeting. If a couple wants the husband to meet me first to make sure I am not a nut, that's fine. If the couple wants to meet me together, I prefer that. However, I generally always look to meet for drinks or dinner first. That way, there is no pressure. If they are not comfortable with me, so be it. Everyone can go home with no feelings hurt. I am very up front when it comes to couples. I look to find people I can go out with for the night and have fun doing social activities. If I can do that, then we can move on to the bedroom if everyone agrees. It's all about comfort levels for myself and for the couple involved. If they both are not comfortable with me, then that's it. It won't progress. I have absolutely no intention of getting involved in a situation where my being there creates friction for a couple. I am not looking to cause problems between them. I am looking for people I can be friends with and also people that I can play with. I know I rambled a bit and for that I apologize. To get back to the topic. I am the outsider at first. However a couple wants to arrange a first meeting with me, I don't really see as how it is my place to make an issue. If I feel that they will work out to be what I hope for, then I meet them where, when and how they ask.

Las Vegas NV
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I do meet single guys by themselves in a public place first, and if they "pass", then they'll meet the wife.

The reason for this is the number of no-shows and game players among single males. (That doesn't mean all of you are bad, or even the majority. But there are definitely some bad apples out there.) She very much doesn't appreciated being stood up, or playing the email game for weeks, only to be disappointed - it makes her feel like she's back in high school. I *always* tell the guy up front that there will be no sexual play in our single meeting, and that the second time he will be introduced to the wife.

Shadyside PA
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I have had a few couples contact me in this manner. We all have different preferences, desires, and fantasies, and this is just one example. Frankly, I find it erotic in the sense that a man wants to bring me home as a "surprise" for his wife. I have never had a bad experience in this situation.

Memphis TN
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We generally exchange a couple e-mails, state what we are looking for and the guys usually agree. We usually meet at our place, have a drink and chat for a bit, then get naked.

We do want the guys to have a face pic posted. We feel that is some assurance that they aren't trying to use us to help ruin their marriage and that they aren't ashamed of what they are doing. After all, it should be swingers on this site that they are risking be outed by. What's the deal? They have as much at risk as you do. The 20/20 show is a good excuse for hiding face pics for a while...if it ever airs.

When it comes to the meeting, many are no shows. Why go through the effort to waste all of our time? You will never get a second chance and singles that behave like that should realize that the word spreads and tarnishes the already bad reputation that many single guys have earned for the majority of gentleman out there. Many are rude when we turn them down because they resent our face pic rule and want to argue about it. We are not here to argue with any one. If you like us and can live with our rules, and we with yours...then great! If not, then why write in the first place? You will never get a chance that way.

Because of the aggravation of some rude singles and the no shows, we have decided that it is easier to find singles by contacting them if we are interested and by getting referrals form couples that know the Single. Couples get over-whelmed with singles e-mail. The result of all the hassles is that we finally changed our profile and asked that singles not contact us, though Single guys are what we first started looking to swing with. We usually play with couples now.

I hope we answered your question and gave you some reasonable insights. I don't know whether we represent a large percentage of couples or not and this is not here to start an argument. It is just our opinion based on our experiences. We hope it is what this thread was trying to ask.

Frederick MD
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We meet single guys together - that is the only way we meet. Never had a problem that way. We prefer to have some nteraction before meeting, usually chat online, to get a good idea if we will click. It is up to both of us whether to invite someone for fun...and we both usually agree about that. It doesn't take long for us to decide whether we like someone or not, so we usually invite someone over for fun that evening. We are actually more cautious with couples, because there are 4 involved and we usualy sense some hesitancy, usually in the other F. I (the F) usually like to just jump right in....

We really haven't had any bad experiences with the guys we meet. The ones who are serious about meeting have been fun :)

Albany GA
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We meet EVERYONE - couples or singles - together at a restaurant.

South Riding VA
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We've heard of a lot of couples where, after they've emailed and IM's with a single guy, the husband (alone) goes out and meets the guy. If the husband thinks he's okay, he brings him home to the wife. We're curious about why this is the way they work it.

Some couples meet the guy together (this is what we do, always, for just drinks or coffee). Far fewer couples appear to send the woman out to meet the guy alone. So, how do you do this and why?

Upland CA
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TOPIC: Couples - How do you first meet single guys and why