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After an Encounter : Swingers Discussion 2121511081
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TOPIC: After an Encounter
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As a single guy on SLS and other sites, I have been fortunate to meet some really great couples. I have made a "connection" with several of them and see them on a regular basis. These types of meetings are usually more satisfying for all involved as we don't need to get past the awkward stage. But having said that, I have met just as many couples who are only looking for a one time deal. I am fine with that as long as all parties are up front about what they want. I tend to look for "friends with benefit" type couples. Where we can have a drink, chat about life, kids, work and then get freaky.... :)

Just my two cents... :)

Yorktown Heights NY
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I have to disagree with that last statement.

To be sure, swinging is a social interchange. Obviously there is sex involved, however it is an intimate social interchange and exhibiting proper manners and etiquette, which would be appropriate in most any social exchange, are equally important, or more so, in our swing relations. I'd say more so, given the intimacy involved. So, I think there is a good measure of "class" involved.

If you just look at swinging virtually as anonymous fucking and nothing else, I see your point. But I don't view it in that manner.

San Luis Obispo CA
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I have to agree with ms sav the word "standards" is a better word to use than "class" After all we are all on here seeking out strangers to have sex with so how much "class" do we have to have to do this?

Vicksburg MS
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I would like to stay in contact with my playmates. My problem and I think may single guys' feeling, is that we don't want to bother the couple or make them think that I am trying to somehow be too possessive of the lady. The last thing I want to do is appear "needy," when I'm just trying to be friendly and keep the swing relationship alive.

But, never hearing from someone you have been intimate with is strange to me. I always either call (prefer) or email. I think maybe you should send a brief "Hey, we had fun" - type email to see what reaction you get. Maybe this guy is just one of those guys with little or no respect for those he is intimate with.

At any rate, I wouldn't get very worked up about it, were I you. As was said earlier, sometimes it's only a one-way connection.

San Luis Obispo CA
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Sed, how true! It's so easy to use your own "standard" as a "standard" for others. It's not the case, nor should it be. Easy to overlook at times though. True, too, that there's all types on here, as in life. Although some personalities do stand out, it's easier to "see" the true person when meeting & spending time with them.......not judging character blindly.

New Orleans LA
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Class, it's so objective I think. What others may consider classy behavior I cringe at. And I'm certain the opposite is true as well. So many examples of class-less behavior, and classy behavior in these fora :).

Allenhurst NJ
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*Finding like minded playmates is a challenge no matter who you are, how hot you are or how high your standards are. That field narrows if you you eliminate single males or are strictly seeking females. *

Agree, it's just logical. I adore logical people btw, particularly women. But I don't find it a big deal. For us it's just a, once in a blue moon thing. We're not actively seeking, never was, I have a husband with whom I'm madly in love. Swinging, is an occasional activity. I would never view it as a challenge, or work, or anything that I'd re-arrange my schedule for, or go out of my way for. It's just something that happens or doesn't.

Allenhurst NJ
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*I tired of people suggesting that their "standards" are so much higher than everyone elses, like the rest of us just hop in the sack with anyone and whom ever offers.*

I tend to laugh when I read this, it generally comes from people who post endlessly how many different people they suck and fuck every single day ;).

It's entertaining to watch for sure.

Allenhurst NJ
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Looking ,,,you say in your post you went slow the first time,,, the second,,, well lol. I believe the second time ,,, changed the way, he enjoyed being with you.But also there maybe a reason behind Why he does not accept or return your contact,,, as a single male, from what i have learned, just move on, he will make contact if he decides to do so. Best of luck.

Newmarket Canada
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"...and having some new sexual boundaries to push against is just all flavors of awesome"

Well said! lol

I would say a 50% "success" rate is pretty good for just starting out so you must be doing something right. It just proves once again that here is no substitute for meeting in person. Someone may look great on a profile, emails and texts can be provocative and flirty and maybe they even sound good on the phone. But you can't predict if that chemistry will be there until you meet face to face. And always trust that instinct that tells you not to talk yourself into it!

Keep it up and keep having fun!

Poland OH
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TOPIC: After an Encounter