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attraction : Swingers Discussion 33927
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TOPIC: attraction
Created by: teocouple The original post for this thread was deleted.
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I believe one reason people just don't reply is because some people become so angry when the reply is a no. I have never experienced that, but I see many mention it. I always reply even if it is with a no. I don't expect a reply every time I email someone, but I also prefer a "no thanks" rather than no reply. I don't expect it, but I appreciate it.

As far as pictures, as stated before me, some people are more photogenic than others. They look better in photos than in person. The rest look better in person than in photos. Do your friends act shocked at how good photos of you look? Congratulations, you are photogenic. Do your friends say, your photos don't do you justice? Congratulations, you are NOT photogenic, so anybody choosing to meet you by your pics will be pleasantly surprised when they meet you. See, it's all good.

As my profile states, I believe everybody has their "minimum physical requirements" and after that it is all chemistry. What is chemistry? Who knows. I have seen several studies that attempted to pin it down and/or assign numbers or values and predict it. I believe they all failed. What attracts you to someone? The way they laugh? The way they talk? The way they carry themselves? That look in their eye just before they tell the punchline to a joke? Sure, we all have our body type preferences, but it's all good if the chemistry is there. The only way to know for sure is to meet and talk. Nothing ventured, nothing gained as they say. But, I believe some people are afraid to meet for the first time because they fear rejection. Hey, it's not rejection, just lack of chemistry.

East Ridge TN
 
 
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The basis for this lifestyle is the attraction between people. Not just their looks, but who they are. Now I do believe that some people have unrealistic expectations, and thus spend a long time looking for something they may never find, while others are more realistic, realize real people are not airbrushed models, and that we all have one or two beauty flaws that we work hard to correct or at least conceal. I honestly believe that 50% of the people on the website are not photogenic, and thus a picture or even web cam, can not give you the whole picture. Cameras add pounds, and shadows can mess up a face. Isn’t the whole point of make-up to use light to create an effect? Also you can be Barbie, but if you have a plastic personality to go with it then you are still unattractive in my opinion. However there are those who may find that extremely attractive… the whole make believe thing.

An example would be a couple we met recently. Based on their profile and pics, I bet they have been passed over by many... but what a pleasant surprise they turned out to be in person, both with their personalities and looks.

As far as rejection goes... I wouldn't get upset. People look for different things. It's not that your ugly, but that maybe your too skinny, or maybe your the wrong skin color, maybe your too young, or perhaps it wasn't your pics, but your use of words in your profile. When people get rejected, they assume the reason is that they are wanted and unattractive to all, and so their ego takes a hit. But think about this… you may be Shania Twain, but if they are looking for Rosanne, then you get rejected.

My final 2 cents: Remember looks will fade over time, but friendships will endure. While your enjoying those who didn’t reject you, those who did, are still looking. Plus, I bet they haven’t had nearly as much fun as you have had. Bottom line... So What, and So Be It.

Hendersonville TN
 
 
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No one likes rejection... Everyone would like to be accepted by everyone else, but that will never happen no matter who you are. It's just a fact of life, some people can take rejection well, others can't. It really is their problem and I wouldn't worry much about if they can take it well or not. It's something that they need to learn to deal with. That said, I think you should always give a reply and always be polite about it at the same time as long as they are.

Colonial Heights TN
 
 
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You either click with someone (i.e., have a sexual attraction), or you don't. People who are sexy to one person may not be to another. No one needs to provide an explanation as to why they don't want to play with someone else. This is a fundamental rule of the lifestyle ("No" means "No"); if someone gets upset when you say "No", they just haven't learned this fundamental rule.

Memphis TN
 
 
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TOPIC: attraction